10 Biggest Turn-Offs for Girls

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Nice Move

1. He Cries

The only times it’s acceptable for a man to cry is at a funeral or at his daughter’s wedding. I don’t want to see you tear up during a sad movie, your eyes better stay dry during a romantic song, and GOD FORBID you cry because something I said hurt your feelings. I can’t even. I’ve said it before, and I’ll say it again, for the most part, men crying is like girls pooing. It doesn’t happen. And if you find out it does, and you haven’t already been bound to this person for all of eternity through marriage, you will be unable to look at each other with a feeling of anything but disgust. Men can get upset, but I prefer they deal with their emotions the old-fashioned way…by berating me or punching something. That way, I can have an emotional response (other than pity, AKA the unsexiest feeling in existence) and the situation can be alleviated without any of the humiliation that would come to both of us if we admitted out loud that a man was going soft (no pun intended).

Veronica (@VeronicaRuckh) is the Director of Total Sorority Move for Grandex, Inc. After having spent her undergraduate years drinking $4 double LITs on a patio and drunk texting away potential suitors, she managed to graduate with an impressive GPA and an unimpressive engagement ring -- so unimpressive, in fact, some might say it's not there at all. Veronica has since been fulfilling her duties as "America's big," a title she gave to herself with the help of her giant ego. She has recently switched from vodka to wine on weekdays. Email her at veronica@grandex.co

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