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29 Rules You Should Be Breaking

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  1. “Don’t double text.”
    Double texting is harmless. Texting someone 50 times when you’re sober and you’ve never actually met before miiiiight come off as a little crazy.
  2. “Never go to bed angry.”
    Go to bed angry because when morning comes, you’ll completely forget what you were mad about the night before.
  3. “Don’t be friends with your ex.”
    It is possible to be friends with an ex… Months and maybe even years after you broke up. Never right away.
  4. “Don’t make someone a priority if they only make you an option.”
    You shouldn’t make him a priority, but he could be a solid addition to your hookup roster.
  5. “Don’t get back together with your ex.”
    People make mistakes and it’s true that everyone changes over time. It can work, if both of you are really prepared to make it work.
  6. “Don’t wear the same outfit in two Instagrams.”
    No one is going to notice but you, and if they do, they’ll probably just assume it’s from the same night.
  7. “You have to hate the same people that your friends hate.”
    Only when you’re actually with your friend.
  8. “Don’t hook up with a friend’s ex.”
    Always ask permission. Always.
  9. “Don’t text him first.”
    It’s 2016 and feminism is all the rage. Do it and he’ll appreciate your bluntness.
  10. “Don’t wear white after Labor Day.”
    Don’t wear white pants. White tops are always in style.
  11. “Don’t ditch your friends for a guy.”
    Leaving the bar early to go home with the super hot guy you’ve been swooning over since freshman year is perfectly acceptable. Disappearing off the face of the Earth ever since you and your boyfriend became FBO is not.
  12. “Don’t sleep around.”
    Sleep around. It’s fun and if there was a time in your life to let loose and be free, it’s now. Or don’t. 100 percent up to you and you alone.
  13. “Don’t date someone who your friends don’t like.”
    Your friends aren’t dating your boyfriend — you are. As long as you like him and he’s not a complete asshole to your friends, it doesn’t matter if they think he’s boyfriend material or not.
  14. “Don’t spend your college years in a relationship.”
    Sure, you might be wasting the greatest four years of your life in a relationship. But you’ll be the one laughing when all your single friends are bridesmaids in your fairytale wedding. Also, true love and all that bullshit.
  15. “Don’t date a guy who’s hotter than you.”
    It’s common knowledge that we should “hook up, date down,” but the satisfaction of an Adonis-like male being completely and utterly obsessed with you, a mere mortal? Can’t beat that.
  16. “You boyfriend should be your best friend.”
    You already have best friends — they’re your sisters. You don’t need another best friend, you need someone to do cute couple things with you and get you off.
  17. “Don’t eat after midnight.”
    Unless you’re drunk. Everyone knows drunk calories don’t count, right?
  18. “Don’t judge a book by its cover.”
    If the book is wearing socks with sandals, judge away.
  19. “You have to tell your best friend everything.”
    That stupid fight you and your boyfriend had about him leaving crumbs in the couch cushions? Maybe keep that between yourselves.
  20. “Don’t give away the milk for free; otherwise, he won’t buy the cow.”
    Even if the milk is free and puts out after just one night, if he likes the cow, he’ll buy it.
  21. “Don’t care too much.”
    Don’t let him know that you care too much.
  22. Don’t cheat in school.
    Utlizing the test bank is a nice way around that.
  23. You can’t wear certain tops if you have big boobs.
    You’re going to look like a porn star, but hey, if that’s what you’re going for, do it.
  24. Liquor before beer, you’re in the clear. Beer after liquor, never been sicker.
    Just don’t drink beer. Problem solved.
  25. Don’t be passive-aggressive.
    It just feels soooooo good.
  26. Don’t live with your best friends.
    It can definitely test a friendship, but when it works out it just makes your friendship stronger
  27. You shouldn’t change who you are for a guy.
    Unless it makes you a better person. Don’t change your hair or clothes for a guy, but if being with him improves you as a person, he’s a catch.
  28. Don’t fall for a fuckboy.
    They make horrible boyfriends, but they’re amazing in bed.
  29. Don’t let anyone tell you what to do.
    This. Follow this rule. Always.

Some rules are just made to be broken.

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Cristina Montemayor

Cristina is a Grandex Writer and Content Manager. She was an intern for over two years before she graduated a semester early to write about college full time, which makes absolutely no sense. She regretfully considers herself a Carrie, but is first and foremost a Rory. She tends to draw strong reactions from people. They are occasionally positive. You can find her in a bar as you're bending down to tie your shoes, drinking Dos XX and drunk crying to Elton John. Email her: [email protected] (not .com).

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