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40 Thoughts You Have When The Barista Gets Your Drink Wrong

starbucks

  1. Okay, what do I want?
  2. 2%, for sure.
  3. And sugar-free.
  4. Iced? Iced.
  5. I need to say this in the correct order.
  6. Oh God, it’s my turn.
  7. I think I stuttered.
  8. Wait, did he write down “S” for soy?
  9. No, maybe that’s a 2.
  10. Or does it say nonfat?
  11. I can’t see from here.
  12. Maybe if I lean over the register juuuust a little bit.
  13. Nope, still can’t see it.
  14. Should I just ask him what he wrote down?
  15. No, definitely too aggressive.
  16. I’ll just watch the barista from afar and make sure he uses the right stuff.
  17. Crap, does 2% have the blue cap or the pink cap?
  18. Wait, did he use the the right syrup?
  19. I don’t think that was sugar-free.
  20. Shit.
  21. He made eye contact.
  22. He knows I’m critiquing his work.
  23. Do I smile?
  24. No, then he will really know.
  25. He’s done already?
  26. I think pulling three espresso shots takes longer than that.
  27. He definitely forgot one.
  28. I paid an extra sixty cents for that shot.
  29. I’m going to say something to him.
  30. But only after I try it.
  31. Smells normal.
  32. Looks normal.
  33. Tastes… normal?
  34. This could be 2%.
  35. And it’s a little weak.
  36. I should ask him to make it again.
  37. Crap.
  38. He’s already making another drink.
  39. Whatever, it’s fine.
  40. Wait. I wanted this iced.

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PSLsandPearls

PSLsandPearls has been shotgunning lattes and looking good since the mid 1990's. In her free time, she cuddles with any animal she can find and incessantly bitches about how busy she is. You can email her at [email protected] (note the single PSL).

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