A Chico State Alpha Gamma Rho Accidentally Shot Himself


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To put it lightly, Chico State has a bit of a reputation. To be more accurate, Chico State is a fucking party school. At its prime, it was considered number one in the nation.

Don’t believe me? In my first weekend here, I smoked a bowl with a cop (yes, he was in uniform). It is actually a rarity for a weekend to go by without at least one couch burning in the middle of the street. We have a specific law against bowling on the sidewalk. At one point, every single fraternity and sorority were disaffiliated for being too crazy. Among other reasons, one fraternity filmed a porno. In their house.

In some ways, Chico State is like a place that does not exist. Because, well, it shouldn’t. On any given day, you will find underage boys on their front lawns playing drinking games with open invitations to anyone walking by. How is this possible? Because everyone who lives in the downtown Chico streets are college students at Chico State. That is literally 17 thousand kids living together and fucking shit up. We are our own town. This means it is pretty hard to get a noise complaint when your neighbors are 19 and making more noise. The police mentality is simply “we can not arrest them all.”

Have I scared you away yet? Well, if you are still considering visiting the City of Trees, then just know that there is a good chance you will shoot yourself. Because that is the type of shit that happens here.

According to the listed police reports on our school’s paper, the Orion, a member of the Alpha Gamma Rho fraternity shot himself with his own gun this past Sunday. Apparently, he shot himself in the hand while cleaning it, giving merit to old adage “it’s the ones we love who hurt us the most.” To make this story even better, this all went down inside the fraternity house. How does that saying go? “Don’t shoot the hand that feeds you?” Well, my man fucking shot the hand that pins on his letters, and if that’s not some next level shit, I don’t know what is.

Now don’t get me wrong, I personally LOVE the men of AGR. In fact, I was partying there Saturday night. AGR is the proclaimed “cowboy” fraternity, and all the members are perfect gentlemen. Chico can be a little much, so anytime a girl wants to party without being creeped on, she can throw on some boots and head on over to their house. They prefer swing dancing to grinding every time, and can talk to you without groping. No place is better to live out your delusional Longest Ride fantasy than with these boys.

But if country music and cheap beer aren’t your style, then go down the Chico Streets. Two other reports included people drunk in public, both without pants. One of them clinging onto her wine for dear life. See, Chico State has a place for everyone… as long as you’re trying to get fucked up. After all, turn up or transfer.

[via The Orion]

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Blondie excels at being an underachiever. She is currently trying to add an extra year onto her undergrad so she can continue to down $7 bottles of wine in an environment that encourages her erratic behavior. After graduation, she has big plans to flunk out of a prestigious law school. Email her compliments and Netflix suggestions at blue.eyed.blondie.tsm@gmail.com

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