All The Best Christmas Songs, Ranked

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All The Best Christmas Songs, Ranked

25. I’ll Be Home For Christmas – Frank Sinatra

A great Christmas ballad, yes, but it doesn’t quite put me in the Christmas spirit. It’s just a little slow and a little sad for my liking. I’d be insane not to include it at all, but it’s just not the best out there.

24. Have Yourself A Merry Little Christmas – Frank Sinatra

I’d be remiss not to include Sinatra on this list. I did it twice in a row, in fact. But much like “I’ll Be Home For Christmas,” while this is a classic, it is so slow that it’s painful. The song would be over in 45 seconds with a 20 second instrumental break if it went at a reasonable speed.

23. Christmas Wrapping – The Waitresses

You think you know this song, and then when it plays, you realize you know only know like four words. “Merry Christmas. Merry Christmas. Blah blah blah blah blah blah blah this year.”

22. Last Christmas – Wham!

Is this song even good? I have no idea! It’s really depressing in a semi-#relatable way. Slightly unrealistic to think someone got dumped the day after Christmas, but I still feel this one in my soul when it plays.

21. White Christmas – Bing Crosby

In your head, you think you love this song — and you do. I mean, I do too. It’s a good one. But it’s just a little sappier than some of the other classics and I find myself skipping it on my Christmas playlist halfway through every time. (Not sappy enough to get deleted though.)

20. Happy Xmas The War Is Over – John Lennon

I did not actually know the title of this song until I wrote this list and uhh, hey, it’s kind of about war. Which just might be why it makes you feel some type of way.

19. You’re A Mean One Mr. Grinch

We sang this in my music class in the third grade, so I might be biased, but it’s seriously a banger.

18. Santa Tell Me – Ariana Grande

I don’t know if this song is even that amazing, I just know it’s an instant classic. This will be the “My Only Wish This Year” for the next generation.

17. Merry Christmas, Happy Holidays – N*SYNC

Boy bands for life.

16. Alvin and the Chipmunks Christmas Song

I’m sorry, but you can fuck all the way off if you don’t want a hula hoop right there with Alvin. I don’t care if it’s for children. Christmas as a whole is basically for Children. I stand by my choice here.

15. My Only Wish This Year – Britney Spears

Britney, I don’t know if Santa can hear you, but we’re glad we can through whatever autotune necessary.

14. Santa Claus Is Coming To Town – Bruce Springsteen

Maybe it’s because I’m from New Jersey, or maybe it’s because Springsteen actually took a kids’ song and made it perfect. That’s for me to decide and you to argue about in the comments section.

13-6.Holly Jolly Christmas – Burl Ives

Numbers 6-13 are borderline interchangeable to me on this list. Lowkey, I will let you fight me on any of this and win. They’re just the upbeat classics that make you think “Christmas music.” Individually, the may not be better than some of the songs that follow, but as a whole, they ARE Christmas. They all kind of sound the same, and they all kind of put you in the spirit, and I barely want to rank them.But Holly Jolly Christmas strikes me as the cheesiest so bye?

12. Let it Snow – Dean Martin

I dig this song in theory, but in practice, snow fucking sucks, so?

11. It’s Beginning To Look A Lot Like Christmas – Perry Como and the Fontane Sisters

Jams are beginning to slow down a little, but I still feel good about it.

10.Walking in a Winter Wonderland – Dean Martin

Literally been wondering for over twenty years who tf Parson Brown is.

9. Rocking Around The Christmas Tree – Brenda Lee

I appreciate this song, because it implies that pumpkin pie (and thus pumpkin spice season) extends past Thanksgiving. Props.

8. Sleigh Ride – The Ronettes

S’Christmas. S’fun.

7. It’s The Most Wonderful Time Of The Year – Andy William

Probably one of the most iconic Christmas songs and that opening lyric really sets the mood for the whole season, tbh.

6. Jingle Bell Rock – Bobby Helms

Jingle Bell Rock reigns supreme over the classics for one reason and one reason alone: Cady Heron.

5. Carol of the Bells – Trans Siberian Orchestra

‘Tis the season to be rocked to your core by a symphony, be absolutely fucking obsessed, and then never listen to orchestra music again.

4. The Christmas Song – Nat King Cole

It’s literally The Christmas song, so of course it cracks the top five.

3. Santa Baby – Madonna

Madonna does this better than the original, which almost never happens, but Madonna was just made to take a Christmas song and make you think: hey, I might enjoy an affair with Santa in exchange for presents as well.

2. All I Want For Christmas – Mariah Carey
Mariah Carey — legend, diva, icon. She can live the entire rest of her life being filthy rich from this song alone. Perfection.

1. Baby It’s Cold Outside

This is my all-time favorite Christmas song, and anyone who wants to say it’s about date rape can suck a fat one. There are too many awesome versions for me to choose just one, but my favorite might actually be the one from Glee.

Honorable Mention: The Hannukah Song – Adam Sandler
Only because it’s not a Christmas song.

Best time of the year.

Veronica (@VeronicaRuckh) is the Director of Total Sorority Move for Grandex, Inc. After having spent her undergraduate years drinking $4 double LITs on a patio and drunk texting away potential suitors, she managed to graduate with an impressive GPA and an unimpressive engagement ring -- so unimpressive, in fact, some might say it's not there at all. Veronica has since been fulfilling her duties as "America's big," a title she gave to herself with the help of her giant ego. She has recently switched from vodka to wine on weekdays. Email her at veronica@grandex.co

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