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Alpha Phi Gets Arrested For Extreme Drunchies

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Listen, the drunchies are serious business. When you are drunk and hungry, all bets are off, and there’s no extreme you won’t go to to get your hands on some food. Which, if you are one sorority woman from Bowling Green State University, includes stealing a catering truck.

After what I can only imagine was some pretty hardcore day drinking, 19-year-old Alpha Phi Monique Vanderhulst, stole the truck early Saturday evening according to Busted Coverage. The truck, which belongs to All Occasions Catering, had been left running while the owner ran inside a nearby building. Vanderhulst drove the truck to a university parking lot, after striking a vehicle, running over curbs, and losing some of the truck’s contents.

Honestly, so far the only real crime is losing that food. I mean, who hasn’t hit a curb, or another car or stolen a truckload of food because they were hungry? That’s what I thought. This is all par for the course. But leaving stolen food behind? That’s where I start to get upset.

When Bowling Green police were finally able to conduct a stop of the truck, Vanderhulst “admitted to police that she had been drinking that day, and was reportedly found to be in possession of a fake Illinois ID which said she was 21 and told police that she did not know the vehicle was a truck and that she thought it was a car,” the Sentinel-Tribune reports. After refusing a breathalyzer test at the Bowling Green Police Division, she was taken to jail.

And she would have gotten away with it too, if it wasn’t for you meddling law-abiding citizens who saw a food truck going rogue. You’d think that’s where things would end, though, right? Girl meets food. Girl steals food. Girl gets arrested on charges of underage consumption of alcohol, drunk driving, and receiving stolen property? After she was released on Monday on her own recognizance, people reported on the story, as often happens with the news. And her brother went the fuck after BustedCoverage’s Joe Kinsey who covered the story.

Of course anyone who would dare write up this story “lives in his mom’s basement and pays for sex.” I’m coming to you live from my mom’s basement right now, actually. If homegirl wasn’t already embarrassed, her brother just made it worse. We all do stupid shit. It’s pretty much the entire point of college. But the best response is always to laugh it off, not have your brother say “you don’t know the real story,” then refuse to tell it. Yikes.

[via Sentinel-Tribune/Busted Coverage]

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2NOTBrokeGirls

Jenna used to be known as 2NOTBrokeGirls, but then one of the girls actually went broke, so she's struck out on her own. Jenna spends her free time saving the world, one sorority girl at a time (usually while wearing yoga pants), questioning why she decided to get a doctorate, and documenting her love of all things cheese related. You can ask her anything you want about football, using your boobs to get what you want, and pizza at @JennaLCrowley on Twitter or via email at JennaLCrowley@gmail.com.

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