I love November. Halloween was fun and Christmas will likely be amazing, but personally, Thanksgiving is my favorite holiday. I love turkey and stuffing and mashed potatoes…all the carbs that I avoid like the plague for the other eleven months out of the year. I love that there are no presents to buy, even though that means that I don’t get any presents. I love spending the day watching football with my family while intermittently getting up to shove more pie in my face. I simply love everything about Thanksgiving.
But there is one thing I don’t care for that happens in the days leading up to my favorite holiday – the #30DaysOfThanks Challenge that seems to inundate my Facebook, Twitter and Insta feeds. That probably makes me sound a little bitchy – shouldn’t I love to see that people are grateful for their families and their friends and their homes and their educations? Of course…but I mean, truthfully, shouldn’t we be grateful for those things all year round? And do we really need to express that appreciation in earnest yet cheesy posts? Blah.
But if you insist upon participating in this yearly challenge, here are some slightly more honest suggestions.
Day 1: Netflix.
Not even “and chill.” Just straight up Netflix.
Day 2: Nachos. And queso. And guac.
Or simply “The Taco Bell Drive Thru at 2am.”
Day 3: Boxed wine.
Because it’s super hard to play “Slap The Bag” with a bottle.
Day 4: Football.
Even if sports aren’t your thing, the tight pants make up for it.
Day 5: Cute Yet Durable iPhone covers.
I drop that thing at least 32 times a day and yet that Kate Spade case keeps it intact.
Day 6: Plan B.
Day 7: Getting your period after Plan B.
No explanation needed.
Day 8: Pumpkin spice lattes.
Because November is still fall, damn it.
Day 9: Red Starbucks Cups.
But yet, Christmas is almost here…
Day 10: Pinterest.
Pretty sure my boyfriend would run far away if I didn’t have a place to channel my wedding hopes and dreams even though he hasn’t yet put a ring on it.
Day 11: Sisters.
Both by blood and by bond.
Day 12: Down comforters and high thread count sheets.
Your bed should be your favorite spot in your place – even if you don’t have anyone to share it with.
Day 13: Dry shampoo.
Because some days, an extra thirty minutes of sleep is more important than a shower.
Day 14: Uber.
Thank god I don’t actually have to verbalize my address at 3 a.m. after five vodka tonics.
Day 15: Photo editing apps.
I can’t afford plastic surgery, so this will have to do.
Day 16: Leggings.
On days where it’s too cold to go pantless, but yet actual pants are just too much of an effort.
Day 17: The Blanket Scarf Trend.
Not only is it stylish, it’s functional in the case of an impromptu nap.
Day 18: Target.
Where else can you buy the perfect period survival kit of Midol, four bags of Reese’s Peanut Butter cups, and a $5 DVD of Step Up?
Day 19: A Boyfriend Who’s Not Into #Buttstuff.
I don’t care if it’s he’s lying, I’m just glad he’s not trying to get it.
Day 20: The ability to monogram almost anything.
I’d lose so much more stuff if it didn’t have my initials on it.
Day 21: TLC’s Friday night “Bride Day.”
How else am I going to find stuff for my secret wedding Pinterest boards?
Day 22: Dogs.
Puppies make everything better. If you don’t believe that, you aren’t the kind of person I need in my life.
Day 23: The pizza emoji.
Because sometimes I’m just too drunk to actually call Domino’s and order.
Day 24: Online retailers that offer free shipping.
How is this just not the norm?
Day 25: Thanksgiving Break.
Four whole days at home with Mom cooking/cleaning/generally babying me? Perfection.
Day 26: Family.
Cheesiness is completely acceptable on Thanksgiving Day only.
Day 27: Black Friday.
Even if I wind up buying more for myself than anyone else.
Day 28: Leftover Turkey. And Stuffing. And Mashed Potatoes. And Cornbread. #carbs.
Gotta bulk up for oversized sweater season.
Day 29: Heading Back To School.
Frankly, Mom is starting to drive me insane.
Day 30: TSM.
Because laughter is cheaper than therapy.
What are you really thankful for?.