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Fail Friday: Suuuper Special Big/Little Bonding

Ten real TSM submissions and one video that didn’t seem quite right. Names were omitted to protect the guilty.

“Why do you hate meeeee” TSM.
–Massachusetts

I hate you for asking that, in what I can only assume is a super high-pitched, whiney, screechy sound that would make me wish someone would Mike Tyson my ears but I can’t speak for anyone else.

Just ate out my future little. TSM.
–Pennsylvania

Was her vajay as precious as you hoped it would be?

Now accepting applications for frat-slams. TSM.
–Ohio

Make sure they include a list of references.

“Does this shirt make me look frat?” TSM.
–Michigan

No.

The key to a man’s heart is making out with his little. TSM
–Anonymous

And all this time I thought that was they key to becoming the frat rat slut groupie. Silly me.

Jersey Shore was cancelled because Snooki was the best part. But they obv should have just cast me! TSM.
–Connecticut

You think you’re just as drunkenly, orangely, MO-ingly, trashily entertaining as Snooki? You’re either A) not. Or B) up for a re-evaluation of yourself.

Sometimes I buy my Lilly from Goodwill. It’s the name that counts! TSM.
–Oklahoma

Sometimes I buy my outfits for a white trash bash at Goodwill and snub my nose at the people who are actually shopping there. So that’s kind of the same thing.

I’d totally shack with Draco Malfoy. The ultimate frat asshole. TSM.
–Georgia

The ULTIMATE “frat asshole” goes to a school for witchcraft and wizardry. ULTIMATE.

My boyfriend stopped calling me for three weeks, so I baked him cookies every day and sent him nudies to show him what he was missing. Best. Slam. EVER. TSM.
–Alabama

Sweetie, I don’t think he’s your boyfriend.

I don’t get all this anti-T Swiftness. I want to be her best friend! TSM.
–Tennessee

Why because boys will like you more because she is 100% more awkward and desperate?

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