Fail Friday: The BEST Sorority Girl EVER

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Ten real TSM submissions and four (but secretly kind of only like one so don’t get that excited) videos that didn’t seem quite right. Names were omitted to protect the guilty.

Sorry, shower shoes mess up my pedicure. Enjoy the athletes foot, bitch. TSM.

Foot fungus, however, goes great with a pair of peep toe wedges.

Did you cheat on me? Hope you enjoy my poop chip cookies. TSM.

Total Minny Jackson Move.

Using your hangover from Saturday night to vomit all over a GDI Sunday morning. TSM.

If anything other than vodka and grilled chicken caesar salad with dressing on the side is mixed into your bile, then this is NS. Otherwise, it’s acceptable.

Forrest Gump’s mom banging the principle of the school so her borderline mentally challenged son could be admitted. TSM
–North Carolina

I’ve got a hankering that you and Forrest Gump may have something in common, my dear.

I don’t spit or swallow. I save. TSM.

…And use it for the glue that holds together the shrine I built of my not-quite-fratdaddy. I then dress up the model in shack shirts I’ve acquired, and spend the night cuddling it and performing voodoo. On the seventh night of ritual, he will become my boyfriend. Works every time.

Blowing bubbles with his cum. TSM.

Like into the air? Or like with a curly straw like small children do with chocolate milk?

Getting realy super drunk TFM. but getting super high from smoking lots of pot. Because pots are in the kitchen. Duh. TSM
–South Carolina

I feel like murdering you.

A pledge failed to satisfy the sorority, so we all got around her and squirted into her face. TSM


Simultaneous orgasm…your sisterhood has reached a level mine has not. And I’m kind of okay with that.

The entire sorority automatically dislikes your family just because the president is in it. TSM

This must be how Barry O-bam’s family feels.

Went to my frat daddies house, I gave him dome while him and his brothers lifted my legs in the air and escorted me through the house and cheered us on. Then I got in trouble for smoking in the house. TSM
–North Carolina

Eww, you smoke? That’s trashy.

Here is a horrendous four-part tutorial for your viewing misery

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  1. gohuskieswa

    these videos can’t be real. content is so dead on, but delivery is just awful. come on WSU, i thought you could do better than that.

    ^ ThisTake a lapReply • 2 years ago
  2. MissAmericanPi

    Ok, while some of her attempts at comedy missed the mark (Victoria’s Secret sweatpants = never funny, always tragic), those videos (especially the 4th one!) were overall pretty funny. If you found absolutely none of it remotely humorous, then you probably are the try-hard that she is parodying.

    ^ ThisTake a lapReply • 2 years ago
    • PrettyinBows

      Exactly. I take it as a compliment that someone pays enough attention to us to mock us. Yeah, it’s exaggerated, but it’s funny because there’s juuust a hint of truth in it. :)

      ^ ThisTake a lapReply • 2 years ago
  3. Mississippi Queen

    The part about Kirstie Alley and the theatre curtain was the only genuinely funny part of these videos (#4). I was prepared to laugh at myself like Shit Sorority Girls Say, but that was the only part I thought was funny. And you have to wonder how many of these TSM fails are written by guys…

    ^ ThisTake a lapReply • 2 years ago

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