Girls Who Met In Bathroom Actually Hang Out, Find They Have Nothing In Common


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UPTOWN — It was a normal Thirsty Thursday for Lindsay Ireland and Megan Murphy, both 21.

“I had just finished up my summer classes and was looking forward to spending the night with some close friends,” Megan told TSM.

“And I was off work the next morning so I knew that I could get plastered without much consequence,” Lindsay added.

Around 12:30 AM last Friday at The Greene Turtle, Lindsay and Megan left their respective groups to head to the bathroom alone, an act of bravery not attempted by many college women. Lindsay held the door open for Megan and upon entering the restroom, Megan noticed Lindsay’s shoes.

“They were so fucking cute,” Megan disclosed, “I felt like she needed to know.”

After fawning over each others footwear, they shared a bathroom stall and exchanged numbers, pinky promising that the next day they would get hungover bagels together.

“We just really vibed at first, you know? And I’ve literally never met a Taurus that I didn’t get along with.” said Lindsay.

When Lindsay woke up the next day, she sent Megan a text reminding her of their predetermined meet-up.

“At first I was apprehensive, but a pinky promise is a pinky promise, and I am a Libra, so I’m a woman of my word,” said Lindsay.

The two of them met at the local bagel shop and embraced after a moment of trying to make sure that the other girl was the same one from the previous night. They ordered their food and sat down at a table outside so that they could keep their sunglasses on without looking like human piles of trash. However, the encounter did not go as expected. They talked about what happened the night before, revisited their affinity for each others’ shoes, and then the two girls were met with about 10 minutes of unbridled silence.

“I literally couldn’t think of anything to talk about. It felt like we talked for hours the night before. I have no idea what happened. Maybe it was because we were tired,” Megan speculated.

They spent the rest of the day asking forced questions, reverting into Recruitment Mode, but even after discussing their majors and why they wanted to rush, there was still nothing left but dead air.

“I had so much hope for this friendship. I felt like the stars brought us together,” Lindsay said, “But it seems like the only thing we had in common was our pee schedule.”

They finished their bagels, went to the bathroom together for old time’s sake, hugged like scarecrows, and went home. No word on whether or not Instagram handles were exchanged. While they started out as insta-besties, it seems like what started as destiny can be chalked up as coincidence.

A born and raised Jersey girl, she can always be found covered in sand and pizza sauce. Her personal brand is "that girl." She prefers wine in bottles because she thinks outside of the box. Send fan mail to or by smoke signal.

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