High School Student Changes Classmate’s Name To “Masturbate” In The Yearbook, Arrested For Felony

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Nice Move

Spotted: Scandal at Hickman High School in Columbia, Missouri.

Member of the yearbook committee, Kaitlyn Booth, 17, is facing criminal charges for a felony, first degree property damage and harassment after playing a little practical joke on her classmate, Raigan Mastain. In between manicures and lattes, Booth had the calculating idea to change Raigan’s last name from “Mastain” to “Masturbate” in the yearbook. Why? Who knows? Maybe the two girls always gave the same guys handies under the bleachers. Maybe they are long-time frenemies and this would be the ultimate victory. Maybe she just has a good sense of humor. Regardless, the yearbook was published with the typo and the yearbook staff was at a loss.

Reprinting 720 copies of the entire yearbook would have cost the school $41,000, and considering only one student would really care about it, it didn’t seem worth it. Instead, the yearbook staff spent twelve hours covering over the misprint with a sticker.

When asked for her opinion, senior Raigan Mastain told the Columbia Daily Tribune, “I was kind of annoyed. It was stupid, but I wasn’t that upset.” She was shocked that this was considered a felony and doesn’t wish to press charges, stating, “When you’re in high school, you do stuff that is not necessarily the smartest, and this was an example of that.” Other examples of that include jean skirts, body glitter, and screaming “Yahtzee” post-handjob because you think the guy will think it’s funny, not weird.

Mastain went on to passive aggressively joke about the situation in a tweet:

Screen shot 2013-05-30 at 11.05.18 AM

Typical senior mentality. Whatever, bitches. I’m outie. Totally TSTC.

As a person whose last name exactly rhymes with an expletive, I have to say this could have been me, and I imagine I would have reacted similarly. I’ve been on the receiving end of “Ruckh jokes” since the sixth grade, so by the time I was old enough for people to realize they were immature to have co-workers making them, it didn’t even phase me. I was all “Ruckh off.”

The only difference between Masturbate Mastain and me is that I was always smart enough to realize that being on the yearbook committee wasn’t worth the effort, but knowing someone on the yearbook committee, so as to be sure your picture would be plastered all over it and prevent mishaps such as this, was imperative.

[via Huffington Post]

Image via Huffington Post

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Veronica (@VeronicaRuckh) is the Director of Total Sorority Move for Grandex, Inc. After having spent her undergraduate years drinking $4 double LITs on a patio and drunk texting away potential suitors, she managed to graduate with an impressive GPA and an unimpressive engagement ring -- so unimpressive, in fact, some might say it's not there at all. Veronica has since been fulfilling her duties as "America's big," a title she gave to herself with the help of her giant ego. She has recently switched from vodka to wine on weekdays. Email her at veronica@grandex.co

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