How To Live The Blonde Life


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I have a confession to make: I am not a natural blonde. My entire life, I have been what people would call “mousey brown.” Not even dirty blonde, ash blonde, or dishwater blonde (ew), but solidly in the brown family. I had always wanted to be a blonde, but not just any blonde, no no. Since middle school, I had asked my mom if I could color my hair, and she said no, that my natural color was pretty. Lies, all lies, mother! I tried to mess around with Sun In back in high school, but it turned my hair orange and I was scarred for life. Growing up in west Texas, everyone’s hair was big, and most importantly, blonde. After bitching about it enough and making many a grand speech about self-esteem to my mother, she finally caved. I was going platinum, baby!

As it turns out, going super light blonde is no small undertaking. I’ve been platinum for about a year now, and I’ve picked up some priceless nuggets of info for anyone who may be considering doing the same.

First of all, figure out if being platinum blonde is right for you. Color-wise, it’s harsh, and for most people, it’s a huge aesthetic change. Ask your colorist if they think you’d look ridiculous or ridiculously cool. Mine approved it, and I was ready to get started. Luckily for me, I had never really colored my hair before, so my coloring process went very smoothly. Beware bleaching already damaged hair, there are horror stories all over the internet. Always, always, always get your hair bleached professionally, trust me. Fortunately, if you’re in the salon and you hate the way it looks, it’s super easy to put any color back on instead.

Bleaching the absolute shit out of your hair damages it, who knew? To help keep your hair from hating you and breaking off left and right, you need to change everything about your hair routine. Masks, deep conditioners, oils, all are your friends. Do your research and think really hard about whether all of the maintenance is something you have time to deal with.

Besides just color and maintenance, being platinum blonde is all about attitude. Like I said, I’ve been platinum for a year, and it’s been the best year of my life. Girls tell me they wish they could pull it off, guys always come up to me at the bars. It’s way more attention than I ever got being a brunette. It’s an iconic look rooted in fashion history. By going platinum, you’re joining the ranks of some of the world’s biggest beauty icons: Marilyn Monroe, Pam Anderson, Gwen Stefani, Debbie Harry. Those are some seriously badass women. Now, that may not only be due to their hair color, but it definitely doesn’t hurt. It takes confidence to slay white blonde hair. It makes everything you wear look just a little bit more edgy. It makes you look more striking. And honestly, it makes you look and feel like a fucking rockstar.

Now, not everyone can be a blonde, many have tried and failed. But if you can pull if off, and you have the guts to actually go for it, I promise you, you’ll never look back.

Happy bleaching.

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