Chrissy Teigen is the girl that we all inspire to be. She’s funny as hell on Twitter, constantly in the news for her smart clapbacks to anyone who even looks at her the wrong way, married to the swoon-worthy John Legend, can cook better than any of us could ever dream to, and, on top of it all, is a model, who might be the only person in the world who pull off looking glam while eating chicken wings in a bikini.
Maybe I’m cynical, or just a tad too bitchy, but when most other girls try to present themselves as the “whole package,” I’m generally doubtful. To me, something never adds up about the girl who claims she eats pizza and drinks beer with the guys every night, yet still maintains her size 2 figure; or the girl who parties every night, and can be found regularly passed out at the nearest frat house, who is claiming that she’s going to medical school in the upcoming fall. However, I have never doubted Chrissy’s perfect ways. I’ve watched her walk the Victoria’s Secret runway, have retweeted her on numerous occasions, and even bought her cookbook, praying that maybe if I too live on a diet of fried, comfort foods, I’ll also attract a high rolling celebrity husband.
Today, however, the facade of the magical Chrissy Teigen has been broken. In an interview with Cosmopolitan, when asked about her husband’s exes she said:
I didn’t know it, but John used to be a notorious modelizer. To me, he was the sweetest teddy bear. What’s funny is that I get along with everyone he’s ever been with. I end up really liking them. After I see them, I’ll tell him, ‘Oh, I was on-set with your ex today—it was fun!’ … It was before me, so it’s fine.
Nope. I don’t buy it. No matter how close Chrissy has come to actually achieving the elusive “cool girl” status, that we all wish we could have, I call bullsh*t. There is no way that she can be completely fine — or “chill” — with her husband’s supermodel past. She doesn’t need to be a completely crazy girlfriend, but there is no way that I believe that she never had an ounce of jealously, creeped the girls on Facebook, or did everything in her power to show the girls that she was better than they were.
Personally, this quote sounds like she is just playing into the male fantasy of what a perfect girlfriend/wife should be. If my boyfriend ever read her interview (luckily, he doesn’t frequently pick up a Cosmo), he would incessantly drone on to me about how this is how I “should” behave around his exes, instead of my usual psycho behavior. She might as well follow this quote up with “And every time I have sleepovers with my model friends, we get naked and have pillow fights!”
Look Chrissy, we already know that you are far cooler than any of us will ever be. Trust me, my plans for today are to make your fried chicken wings, and then spend the rest of the day wondering why I don’t look good in a bandage dress as well. But you don’t need to oversell it. We’re all girls here – and if my boyfriend had a past of dating supermodels, there is no doubt in my mind that I wouldn’t be satisfied until I had told her that my boyfriend is the “happiest he’s ever been” and creeped her on Facebook until I knew her uncle’s cat’s name and saw photos of her embarrassing prom dress..