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Kate Upton is Vogue’s June Cover Girl

Anna Wintour, what the fuck have you done?

This June, the front cover of Vogue will not be graced by some elegant and timeless beauty. Vogue will not be featuring a fashion icon, or an Oscar winner. We won’t even be blessed with the presence of royalty, as we were after Will and Kate’s wedding. Nobody of merit will be putting their face on the cover of the world’s most famous fashion magazine. Instead, one, Kate “Well Marbled” Upton is who Vogue has chosen to be on the cover.

What the fucking fuck?

Say what you will about Kate Upton, but there is no denying she is beautiful. I won’t discount her “All American girl” type beauty, or her “healthy” body type. I just can’t understand why she should have any publicity in a magazine that is the ultimate authority on clothing when she’s built her entire career around not wearing any. It makes sense as to why she would be on the cover of Sports Illustrated: the Sports Illustrated swimsuit edition is read by guys, who don’t care if someone can style themselves, they just care about looking at a good set of boobs. Vogue, however, is EVERYTHING in the world of fashion, second only to its French counterpart. She doesn’t deserve to be on its cover. In the interview, Kate admits that she never used to read fashion magazines growing up, which is obvious in her “fashion sense.” It’s also not a far stretch to assume the only comprehensive reading Kate has ever really done is of a menu.

Kate Upton is on her way to becoming the supermodel of our generation, apparently. She’s been wrongly compared to Gisele and Naomi. In her Vogue interview, she is praised for utilizing social media (Twitter and YouTube) to jump start her career, rather than waiting to be discovered like every other model, ever. She’s never been the face of a fashion line. She won’t even be considered as a Victoria’s Secret model. So why is she so popular in the “fashion” world? Because people are idiots.

I would NEVER align Kate Upton with any real supermodels, because she has no fashion sense or actual modeling ability. I would put her more in the “Playboy Bunny” camp than backstage at a fashion show. She’s built a career running around in swimsuits, which is fine, but it’s not fashion. Kate Upton is best known for doing a cat daddy, not a catwalk, which is why news of her June Vogue cover came as such a shock. I was also surprised that Vogue would have anything larger than a sample size available for their cover girl, so I’m guessing some exceptions had to be made and clothes had to be brought in to fit Upton’s 5’10 and “healthy” (re: fat) frame.

In her interview, Kate talks about how she’s interested in starting her own fashion line.

HOLD THE FUCKING PHONE.

Listen, girl, a swimsuit line? Maybe. A fashion line? Do you wear actual clothes? Let’s examine Kate’s “fashion” sense here:

Here she was at Marquee in Vegas, wearing a dress that did nothing for her famous “curves.” Instead it made her look fatter than usual.
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Here she is in New York City, trying to achieve a “trailer park soccer mom” look, one would assume.
Samsung Spring Launch event in New York

And again, in New York City. Say it with me, Kate: “SPANX”
Kate Upton

And, here she was at the Met Ball this past week (why the fuck was she there, again?) completely ignoring the “Punk: From Chaos to Couture” theme, favoring instead “Trophy Wife who still thinks Acrylic Nails are Okay.”
upton4

I’m not denying that Upton is pretty, and I’m not trying to take away from her massive success as a Sports Illustrated model/girl on YouTube doing the Cat Daddy. I’m just saying that giving her any type of actual credibility in the fashion world is ridiculous.

[via Just Jared]

Image via Associated Press

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