My Boyfriend Hates My Sorority


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I am the vice president of my sorority at a school that idolizes Greek life like it’s another religion. And it just so happens that my boyfriend is recruitment chair for his fraternity at a different school. Seems like a perfect, Greek match, right? The only problem? The school he goes to pretty much confuses Greek letters with another language. But more than that, he is a part of a pretty sucky chapter. I’m pretty sure there are more people in line during your drunk Taco Bell run then there are in his entire chapter. My point being, our experiences in Greek life are very different.

Being in a fraternity is in no way a deal breaker for me when it comes to dating. It just happened to work out that way.

Anyway, he loves his fraternity like most guys, and I wear my letters with pride and stick them on everything I own and then some, like most girls. I love that we are both in Greek life because we can bitch about chapter, mandatory functions, and dues. However, it is kind of hard for him to relate when I have more girls in my pledge class than he does in all of his school’s fraternities combined. But nonetheless, he listens.

But then I ran for executive council. And I got elected vice president.

Serving as vice president is one of the greatest things I’ve done in my college life. Maybe even my entire life. I love it way too much and spend way too much time committed to it. But it’s not just because I want to, it’s because I have to. People tend to brush off sororities as just an excuse to get drunk and own 2,827,620 t-shirts. And while I’m not denying that we do both of those things, it’s also a lot of fucking work. Sorority girls don’t just show up to a bar and decide they are going to have a party and get shit faced all night. Forms have to be filled out, venues rented, t-shirts made. Philanthropy events have to be planned, recruitment workshops have to happen, and the to-do lists and exec meetings are never ending.

And my boyfriend HATES it. Since I am on executive board, the chapter knows me and sees me as the woman of answers (probably because I’m one of the few nice ones on the board) but I am constantly getting blown up with texts, emails, groupmes, you name it. I never get a moment alone to unplug. I never get a moment away. But the thing is? I don’t want it.

To me, this is what I signed up for. I pay three grand a year to be everyone’s answer woman, to plan events, to be buddy buddy with fraternity presidents. And I fucking love it.

But to him, Mr. Twenty-Three members in his whole chapter, I am “neglecting him.” I “care more about date parties than going on an actual date” (not true because homegirl loves free food). We actually got into a screaming match at a date dash because he said he couldn’t dance with me without someone needing me for something.

You get the point.

The worst part? It’s hard for me to argue that when it’s sort of true. While I do love him, I also love my sorority and my sisters and I fucking love my position. I can’t help that he doesn’t have much to do since A) he’s a boy and they don’t plan or organize anything until the night before and B) he has barely any members to recruit.

I love him more than anything in the world (including my dear-to-my-heart sorority) but if he doesn’t support me in this, will he support me next year when I’m hopefully the president of this chapter? Or what about in five to ten years when I’m the head host of the E! Network? What about when I’m president of the United States? I don’t need a jealous boy who holds me back. I need a strong man who supports, encourages, and helps me accomplish my dreams.

Let’s hope Mr. Rush Chair either finds some men to recruit or gets off my ass because I have a sorority to run and a future to own.


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