I’m a very logical and reasonable person, which is why I believe in astrology. I mean, come on. It’s written in the stars. Can’t get much more logical than that. My entire identity is wrapped up in my sign, which is what makes the following news so devastating.
NASA reports that there’s actually 13 constellations in the Zodiac instead of 12, which basically means everything is fucked up. The constellation is called Ophiuchus, and if your birthday is between November 29 and December 17, it’s your new sign. Not only is there this new sign, but this addition also means the original 12 signs have to be squished and adjusted to make room for Ophiuchus. Here is your updated sign, according to Modern Astrologers:
- Capricorn: Jan 20 – Feb 16
- Aquarius: Feb 16 – March 11
- Pisces: March 11 – April 18
- Aries: April 18 – May 13
- Taurus: May 13 – June 21
- Gemini: June 21 – July 20
- Cancer: July 20 – August 10
- Leo: August 10 – September 16
- Virgo: September 16 – October 14
- Libra: October 14 – November 23
- Scorpio: November 23 – November 29
- Ophiuchus: November 29 – December 17
- Sagittarius: December 17 – January 20
I feel duped. Lied to. Deceived. Like my entire life is a lie. What’s worse is that the Babylonians knew this 13th constellation existed way back when they first divided the zodiac into parts, but they had already divided the calendar into 12 months so they thought they could just ignore that 13th constellation. Not cool, guys.
So what does it mean if you’re an Ophiuchus? Your sign is a man named Serpentarius holding a snake and it means you seek peace and harmony. Ophiuchus’ are poetic and inventive and have a thirst for knowledge. They also have secret enemies in their close circles. This snake sign reminded me of a certain snake in popular culture, and as it turns out, Taylor Swift falls under Ophiuchus. Coincidence? I think not.
If you find yourself in denial about your “new” sign, I get it. You may think your entire existence aligns with Aries, but you could be wrong. I used to be a Gemini and according to this, I’m now a Taurus. Apparently, I like gardening, cooking, and music. Who knew? Not me until today!
Get familiar with your new identity, I mean, sign here. .
Image via Shutterstock