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Sorry Ladies, Your “Friends With Benefits” Is Never Going To Date You

FWB

Pros Of Being Friends With Benefits (FWB):
1. You have the same group of friends.
2. You actually enjoy each other’s company.
3. Sex.

Cons Of Being Friends With Benefits:
1. He’s never going to date you.

Okay, maybe not never, but thanks to a new study published by Business Insider, chances are that you’ll never be FBO with your FWB. The study that completely destroyed our dreams of not dying alone took place over the course of a year and involved 191 people (most of whom were heterosexual, white, females). Basically they asked these ladies what they wanted from their relationship and how happy they were with their sex-uation. Then, a year later, they asked the same people the state of their FWB relationships. And honestly, it’s not looking good for us.

Those who wanted to go back to being just friends appeared to be the most successful, with 60% of those who desired that outcome at Time 1 attaining it at Time 2. Those who wanted to remain FWBs long-term were somewhat less successful, with 40% of those desiring it at Time 1 reporting that they were still FWBs at Time 2. Lastly, those who wanted to transition into romantic partners were the least successful, with just 15% of those who initially wanted that outcome reporting such a transition.

Yikes. 15 percent. That’s 29(ish) people who actually landed a boyfriend. Which is discouraging being a lady in the hookup generation. So, as a lucky 15 percent-er who managed to turn my FWB into an actual relationship, I’ll give you a few secret tips to locking that dick down.

1. Don’t be an annoying bitch.
Seriously. Don’t talk about your diet. Don’t talk about the Kardashians. Don’t talk about your cat too much. Try to be an actual likable person.
2. Don’t expect him to come forward and ask you out.
He has a good thing going. If you develop feelings, speak up. He’ll either return the gesture or tell you he doesn’t like you. If that’s the case, then who the hell cares? He’s a weenie, and it’s not worth your energy, heart, or vagina to give it to someone who doesn’t like you back.
3. Stop trying so hard.
You don’t need to contour your face to relax at his apartment. You don’t need to take a zillion selfies with him. You don’t need to “make” him watch rom coms or text you back right away. Just chill the fuck out, decide if you actually enjoy each other’s company, and go after what you want. Or just build a boyfriend trap made out of a giant box and some beef jerky. Either works, really.

[via Business Insider]

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Rachel Varina

(yeahokaywhat) Aspiring to be the next Tina Fey, Rachel spends her free time doing nothing to reach that goal. While judging people based on how they use "they're" vs. "there" on social media, she likes eating buffalo chicken dip, watching other people's Netflix, and wearing sweatpants way more than is socially acceptable.

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