The 7 Types Of Seniors


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Nice Move

7 Types Of Seniors

1. “Fuck it, We Out.”
This is the most common type of senior. She is, for lack of a more fitting word, just so over it. She drinks wine through her tumbler during chapter, and if your exec thought it would change her behavior, she’d have been sent to Standards twelve times by February.

2. Can’t Let Go
You know who I’m talking about. This girl may have held one or two positions, probably minor ones, but she thinks she is the source for knowledge when it comes to your chapter. She’s convinced she has to have an opinion of EVERY SINGLE spring pledge, and that hers is right. She shows up to everything, has an opinion on every exec decision, and completely ignores the fact that no one cares anymore. She lacks a plan for after graduation, and maybe that’s why she’s holding on so tight. Either way, good luck with this one.

3. “But whatever, it’s not my chapter anymore.”
A combination of the first two, this senior pretends she’s ready to leave, but still gives an opinion at the most inopportune times. She gives rants during chapter, and she’s most likely to be seen rolling her eyes when the girl who took over her exec position speaks. How to tell this one apart from the rest? Every insult, cleverly disguised with a piece of misguided advice, ends with: “But whatever, it’s not my chapter anymore.”

4. The Freshman
This one never grew up. Sure, she’s graduating, but she hasn’t matured like the rest of you. You can tell this senior apart from the rest because she ONLY HANGS OUT with younger members (because everyone else has realized how nuts she is). She doesn’t have a close group of senior friends, her Twitter feed is full of inspirational quotes, her last ten Instagram posts have been with her boyfriend who she met last year. Another distinguishing point about this girl? She’s batshit crazy.

5. Miss We’ve-Always-Done-It-This-Way
She can be a nightmare for the chapter exec board. She wants everything done the way it was when her big’s grandbig was around, and she speaks of one senior who graduated in 2011 like she is Tory Burch herself. All you can do for this one is try to grind into her that change is good, and pray for May to end quickly.

6. “Wait, What?”
Your seniors know this one well. She’s completely unprepared. She doesn’t have a resumé, doesn’t have a plan, and she might not even have the GPA to graduate. She tilts her head during meeting, still has no idea when she’s supposed to speak, and probably has a string of fake pearls. She might be going alum but sticking around to finish up a year or two, but either way, this girl needs nothing but your prayers.

7. The One Who Knows It’s Time
All good things come to an end. This woman knows that she will miss the hell out of college, but she’s accepted the fact that her four years are up. She was probably chapter president or philanthropy chair, but either way, she has a good head on her shoulders. She knows that things will work out, and she spent her last semester focusing on her group of close friends. Sure, she loves your sorority, but she knows that her time is almost up, and is spending it with those who matter most.


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