The Curse of King Tut’s Tits. No Really, He Had Tits

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The mystery of King Tut’s death has been debated for ages: leprosy, murder, etc. However, a new theory has been proposed, which is either far more or less horrifying than the earlier options, since I have never been a male who has dealt with growing breasts. Hutan Asfrian has proposed that the form of epilepsy killed king Tut that caused a feminine physique and his subsequent death by seizure induced fall

Sculptures and paintings of the pharaoh, and four of his close male relatives, show they had unusually large breasts and wide hips. Not only that, but all of these kings died relatively young suggesting they may have shared an inherited condition.

This form of epilepsy also may have cause hallucinations, since it was associated with the corresponding part of the brain, a quality which was doubtless problematic for his subjects. His mummified body was too damaged to be definitive, but his ancestors also had pronounced breasts. While the theory is impossible to prove given the age of the bodies, it is nevertheless the most entertaining theory. The image of King Tut letting his, I believe the appropriate term is beefers, fling around while he had hallucinations in front of a stunned audience is too much not to share.

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