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The Playlist Is The Only Thing Keeping Me At Any Frat Party

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Good music is the one thing that will keep me at a fraternity party that otherwise sucks. When I say sucks, I mean a couple different things. One is that there are no boys I’d consider throwing myself at. Another is that the frat ran out of drinks (God forbid). Music is the make-it-or-break-it aspect of a party for me, and even frats with the hottest of boys can’t keep me at a party if the music is terrible. It’s also worth it to note that a good playlist means that I’m going to dance (read: gyrate drunkenly), which means I’m going to want to dance with someone (read: any boy in sight).

There is an art to the perfect frat party playlist, and if a frat’s is good I will always consider coming back. A good playlist is a game changer, and I’m convinced some top frats haven’t realized this. It’s probably because they think they can keep girls at parties on looks alone. Honestly, though, if I know a house down the street always has a solid playlist, then I’m leaving a top house for one that I can actually have fun at.

So what exactly makes a good frat playlist? I would say the first thing is a balance of the genres. If a frat is only playing EDM music, I’m going to leave because I can’t fuckin’ dance to that, and I want something more interesting than beat drop after beat drop. Remember, this isn’t EDC — this is a gross frat house that I’ve graced with my presence. The right playlist is a mix of current jams and straight bangers from middle school that I remember every single word to. Bonus points if there’s an addition of a couple songs that aren’t regular fraternity party songs like ‘Stacy’s Mom’ or ‘Mr. Brightside.’ My friend once told me she ran into a frat solely because they were blasting ‘Mr. Brightside’ because, you know, that’s a good fucking song.

Another important aspect of the frat playlist is the all-important last song of the night. I love staying until the end of a party at one of my school’s fraternities because they always end the night with the song ‘Piano Man.’ It’s definitely not a song anyone thinks of when fraternity parties come to mind, but it ends the night right, and everyone I know wants to stay until the end of their parties to hear it. If a frat doesn’t have a tradition like this one, it’s important for the DJ (AKA a sweaty fraternity boy) to choose the right song to end the party. Just make sure this isn’t a song I’ve heard at every other frat party that night. Throw it back or find the best new song.

The last important thing about frat party playlists is not even a part of the playlist. It’s the guy in charge of playing the playlists. His most important job is to see if people are vibing with the music, and it’s not hard to tell. When everyone, including that drunk girl who’s been dancing on the same platform since the party started, has stopped dancing, it’s time to skip to the next banger. A surefire lady pleaser is any of my man JB’s new songs. And in the words of the great Rihanna, please don’t stop the music. If anything’s worse than bad music, it’s no music at all. Change the song, and let’s all move on with our lives.

The decision to come to or leave all of a frat’s parties rides on whether or not it plays good music. Even if I got drunk there last week and don’t want to see the mistake — I mean guy — I hooked up with, I will surely come back if it has the best playlist on the row.

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