Columns

The Sorority Girl’s Version Of “Santa Baby”

Santa baby, slip some pinot under the tree,
For me.
Been a pretty nice girl all year,
Santa baby, so hurry down the chimney tonight.

Santa baby, maybe some crisp chardonnay, too,
Thank you.
I’ll be here with some beer,
Santa baby, so hurry down the chimney tonight.

Think of all the classes I’ve missed,
Think of all the boys that I could’ve kissed,
Next year I’ll be just as good,
If you’ll check off my Christmas list.

Santa baby, I’d really like a very hot guy,
No lie.
Been a good sis all year,
Santa baby, so hurry down the chimney tonight.

Santa honey, the one thing I really do want,
A jaunt
To TSM Spring Break.
Santa honey, so hurry down the chimney tonight.

Santa cutie, fill my stocking with some booze,
You choose!
And don’t forget lots of wine.
Santa cutie, and hurry down the chimney tonight.

Come and trim my Christmas tree,
And underneath put a new puppy,
I really do believe in you,
Let’s see if you believe in me.

Santa baby, forgot to mention one little thing,
Some bling,
Glittery silver and gold.
Santa baby, so hurry down the chimney tonight.
Hurry down the chimney tonight,
Hurry, tonight.

Email this to a friend

Jenna Crowley

Jenna used to be known as 2NOTBrokeGirls, but then one of the girls actually went broke, so she's struck out on her own. Jenna spends her free time saving the world, one sorority girl at a time (usually while wearing yoga pants), questioning why she decided to get a doctorate, and documenting her love of all things cheese related. You can ask her anything you want about football, using your boobs to get what you want, and pizza at @JennaLCrowley on Twitter or via email at [email protected].

For More Photos and Videos

Latest podcasts

New Stories

Load More