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There Are Period Panties That Let You Bleed On Trump’s Face

Blood dumpster

Period panties are foul. The only thing more uncomfortable than spotting in your jeans is letting your entire period seep into your jeans. No amount of Tide pods would ever convince me that those uterus encrusted undies were ever truly clean. However, there is a pair of period panties that I can get behind. Or I guess put on my behind.

Cute Fruit, a shop on Etsy, has crafted “Bloody Marys,” a line of period panties that are leak-proof, antibacterial, moisture-wicking, and have the faces of politicians right on the inside of the crotch. Not just any politicians, they are specifically those who have or are currently fighting against women’s rights. In any other context, you wouldn’t want any of these people anywhere near your goodies, but there is a strange satisfaction in secreting your female fluids all over their faces.

Not only do they come in a variety of colors, but they also come in a variety of faces. Their website features each “Blood Dumpster” you can choose from, as well as a compilation of all the legislation that they have supported and bullshit that have spewed from their mouths. Choose from Jeb Bush, Sarah Palin, Ted Cruz, Tom Emmer, Mike Huckabee, John Kasich, Rand Paul, Rick Santorum, and The Donald. The high-waisted underwear comes with two reusable heating pads that can be snapped onto your stomach or your back for one-the-go cramp calming.

While you are violating the face of these villains, you can sleep soundly knowing that $3 from every pair of Bloody Marys sold will go towards funding the Planned Parenthoods that are in the states governed by the Blood Dumpster that is featured.

What a bloody good idea.

[via Women’s Health]

Image via Bloody Marys Undies

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Ali Hin

A born and raised Jersey girl, she can always be found covered in sand and pizza sauce. Her personal brand is "that girl." She prefers wine in bottles because she thinks outside of the box. Send fan mail to [email protected] or by smoke signal.

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