There’s A Real Life “Gone Girl” And She Makes The Rest Of Us Look Completely Sane


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If you haven’t seen Gone Girl, the entire movie is one big plot twist. It’s a mystery/thriller about a woman who goes missing and her husband, who is the prime suspect. The movie has a lot of twists and turns, but basically, the wife turns out to be batshit crazy. She’s every guy’s worst nightmare.

The movie is basically a lesson to men everywhere that compared to this psycho bitch, we aren’t that bad. Sure, we looked through your phone once or twice and maybe we even saved our fingerprint when you weren’t looking. But hey, at least we didn’t frame you for our own murder!

We thought the book and movie were just fiction — a movie we make our boyfriends watch every once in awhile to remind him that it could be worse. But as it turns out, there’s a real life Gone Girl and she’s worse than anything Gillian Flynn could’ve imagined when he wrote the book.

Eighty-year-old Melissa Ann Shepard has harmed three out of her four husbands and one boyfriend since the 1990s. She would seduce older men, drain their savings, and then drug their coffee or ice cream.

She ran over her second husband twice with a car, and while it was the car that ultimately caused his death, the coroner found near-lethal amounts of drugs and alcohol in his system. Shepard insisted that her second husband was trying to rape her and she was just trying to escape, but she was ultimately found guilty of manslaughter.

After she was released from prison, she married her third husband, Robert Friedrich. He started falling over while they were on their honeymoon and died less than a year after the two were married. He left her $100,000. His sons believe she overdosed his prescription medication, but she was never charged.

She moved on to a new guy, Alex Strategos, who realized she was poisoning his ice cream with Lorazepam after several trips to the hospital. She spent five years in prison for stealing $20,000 from him.

She met her fourth husband, Fred Weeks, at a retirement community in Nova Scotia, but he, too, fell ill during their honeymoon at a bed and breakfast.

“Mr. Weeks didn’t look well at all. He looked a little green, very gaunt-looking,” the hotel owner said. “Mrs. Weeks, on the other hand, she was beautifully groomed, in a lovely red suit.”

Doctors found evidence of tranquilizers in Mr. Week’s blood and Melissa went off to prison again, this time for 3.5 years.

She made the news again this week when she was arrested for using the internet at a public library to look for men online. This was in direct defiance of her prison release terms. After her release in March, police issued a public warning, banned her from internet (yes, that’s possible), and ordered that she tell them about any men in her life so that they can be warned about her husband-harming ways.

But this crazy bitch just can’t stay away from the men, and after this last arrest, it could mean she’ll face more jail time.

“Can you change?” the CBC asked her in 2005.

“I can’t say that from now on I’ll be a perfect citizen,” she said, “but I’m just going to try, day by day, to behave myself and do what I should have been doing all along. But I can’t say that that is going to be the outcome of how my life will end.”

Gone Girl ain’t got nothing on this crazy bitch.

[via NYMag]

Image via Youtube

Cristina is a Grandex Writer and Content Manager. She was an intern for over two years before she graduated a semester early to write about college full time, which makes absolutely no sense. She regretfully considers herself a Carrie, but is first and foremost a Rory. She tends to draw strong reactions from people. They are occasionally positive. You can find her in a bar as you're bending down to tie your shoes, drinking Dos XX and drunk crying to Elton John. Email her: (not .com).

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