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There’s A School That Teaches You Exactly How To Be A Porn Star

Porn Star

According to myself, I am fucking amazing in bed. Would you get the same answer if you asked the guys I have slept with? Eh, maybe not. But what do they know? I like to tell myself that while I am riding a guy that I am changing his whole world. Sure, maybe his new girlfriend is smarter, prettier, richer or all-around better than me in every way, but can she take a dick better than me? I like to tell myself no. Whether or not it is true, my pre-date pep talks always involve something along the lines of “you could be a porn star!” And now, I am happy to say, I actually could be. Probably.

According to Elite Daily, there is a now a school where I can learn exactly what it takes to be a porn star. Cue the music because it’s my time to shine, ladies.

Between my undergrad and law school I’m looking at at least eight years (probably ten) of schooling, which is being billed to my parents — the cost is a number I’m completely oblivious to, but if I had to guess, based solely on how many times they tell me that a new formal dress is not part of the emergency fund, it’s a shit ton. But not this school. This school only takes three days. If this program is really telling me that I can be as good as the girls in the porn my boyfriend pretends not to watch than sign me the fuck up.

While fucking on film may be the general focus of this curriculum, that is hardly all you get to learn while attending this fine establishment. Other aspects of adult entertainment, or entertainment in general such as script writing, creating a shot list, lighting, operating a camera, and editing are all part of the curriculum. This brings me to question every theatre major ever. What are you doing for the four years in school?

One part of this I really do agree with, however, is that the students are taught not to pull from their own lives. One student said, “Through sex, you can attack so many other things… gender, gender politics, white supremacy and anti-black racism, capitalism, imperialism and the patriarchy.” That is something I can fully get behind. While I understand that most people are not particularly looking for the underlying message while they’re flicking the bean, I can appreciate putting your own morals and beliefs behind your work. Are you tired of watching the racism around you? Put that bullshit in a movie. It’s moving, it’s empowering, and I love it.

If your immediate reaction is to turn your nose up at these young aspiring actors, take note that this program is far from easy to get into. Allegedly, due to the limited participant capacity, the application process is fairly competitive.

As far as the stigma surrounding adult entertainment goes? Well the head of the program, Madison Young, is not only a former BDSM porn star, but also a feminist. Is it possible? Hell yeah it is! Young has crushed the shame associated with filmed sex and created a sense of confidence among her students. Which, again, I can fully get behind. I mean if I can have fun discovering exactly what and who gets me off in life, why shouldn’t they get to? And they get paid?! Double incentive.

So maybe the porn industry isn’t for me. But it is for a lot of people. And, as my mom always said, it doesn’t matter if you’re a doctor or a porn star, if you’re the best at what you do you deserve to be proud of your work. I, for one, am excited to watch the new prodigies that are graduating from this program. After all, they’re making the world a better place, one self-induced orgasm at a time.

[via Elite Daily]

Image via Shutterstock

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Blue-eyed-blondie

Blondie excels at being an underachiever. She is currently trying to add an extra year onto her undergrad so she can continue to down $7 bottles of wine in an environment that encourages her erratic behavior. After graduation, she has big plans to flunk out of a prestigious law school. Email her compliments and Netflix suggestions at blue.eyed.blondie.tsm@gmail.com

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