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This Edible Prosecco Nail Polish Has Proven That We’ve Taken This Obsession Entirely Too Far

Prosecco Nails

Like any other mid-twenties female with a sizeable Instagram following, I like to remain in tune with the trends. Unsurprisingly, one that has stood the test of time has been our undying love of prosecco. Our obsession has inspired a Prosecco festival, the creation of an actual Prosecco theme park, and we’re drinking so much of it that we don’t give a fuck that it’s literally giving grape farmers cancer. Product developers are starting to catch on, and Groupon is no exception since they’re now attempting to sell us edible Prosecco nail polish.

That’s right, you can now paint your nails a sparkling champagne color and then lick it off of your hands to taste Prosecco without the benefits of getting drunk. I had hoped and prayed that the edible nail polish trend would have died with KFC polish, but unfortunately, I was sadly mistaken. Apparently Groupon thinks that our obsession with prosecco reaches so far that we’ll go through the process of manicuring our nails, licking our fingers (which, ew), ruining the manicure we spent God knows how long on, consuming strange chemicals, and not even getting a buzz in the process.

I’m all for keeping up with trends, but when these trends are weird AF, I’m out. Maybe I’m just an old soul, but I miss the days of consuming alcohol the way it was meant to be consumed. Let’s go back to popping bottles while making your BFF take a Boomerang and then drinking straight from the bottle all night, ok? Please, don’t be that weird girl in the corner of the party licking your fingers to keep the party going. But hey, if you lost your fake on spring break and are stuck in a pinch, who am I to judge?

[via Food and Wine]

Image via Shutterstock

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RecruitmentChairTSM

RecruitmentChairTSM (@TheRecruitChair) is a contributing writer for Total Sorority Move. This current grad student and ex-sorority girl survives solely on Diet Coke and the tears of the pledges she personally victimized. She's a Monica, a Marnie, a Miranda, and a Regina. Her favorite hobbies include drinking $14 bottles of wine and binge-watching season 2 of Grey's Anatomy until she cries. You can send her annoying e-mails at RecruitChairTSM@gmail.com

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