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Victoria’s Secret Fashion Show Fails

It’s that time of year again — where normals like us make bad jokes about being fat while watching skeletons prance across a stage made of glitter in lingerie and high heels. It’s a weird self-loathing tradition, that we absolutely must take part in year after year for three reasons: 1.) We need to stay up to date on pop culture. 2.) We need to see what a million dollar bra looks like. And 3.) We need to keep an eye out for fallen angels, because while we’re out here on social media pretending to be kind, we all know that we secretly revel in the drama and misfortune of people who are better-looking than we are.

There haven’t been many blunders through the years, but I’ve collected a few gems, and here’s to hoping we get another something fabulous tonight.

Ariana Grande Getting Hit In The Face With Elsa Hosk’s Wing — 2014

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LONDON, ENGLAND - DECEMBER 02:  Ariana Grande performs as Elsa Hosk walks the runway at the annual Victoria's Secret fashion show at Earls Court on December 2, 2014 in London, England.  (Photo by Samir Hussein/Getty Images)

LONDON, ENGLAND – DECEMBER 02: Ariana Grande performs as Elsa Hosk walks the runway at the annual Victoria’s Secret fashion show at Earls Court on December 2, 2014 in London, England. (Photo by Samir Hussein/Getty Images)

Ariana Grande’s face is a sweet, sweet treasure we were blessed with in this moment, but perhaps the best part of this photo is Elsa Hosk, just strutting past her like, well, a model. Ariana looks like a peasant next to an unbothered queen. It’s a damn shame they cut the blunder out of the actual airing, and we didn’t get a closeup of the action, but the photos will live on forever.

Cara Delevingne’s Awkwad Dancing 2013

And if you need to see that just one more time.

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Is she high? Based on literally everything else I know about Cara Delevingne, she’s probably high actually. I don’t know what is going on here, or why she took the finale as her opportunity to turn into a wavy inflatable tube man that belongs outside a dealership, but I’m forever grateful for this moment.

Karolina Kurkova loses shoe 2012

This is the single greatest moment in runway history. Maybe not. I don’t know even close to all of runway history, but this was an incredible recovery. Karolina Kurkova does not miss a single beat when her shoe falls off LIKE SHE TOLD EVERYONE IT WOULD, but she goes out there and absolutely destroys the runway. If the camera didn’t literally zoom in on her wardrobe malfunction, you wouldn’t even know it happened. Bad bitch contest, you’re in first place.

That’s what I call entertainment, people.

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Veronica Ruckh

Veronica (@VeronicaRuckh) is the Director of Total Sorority Move for Grandex, Inc. After having spent her undergraduate years drinking $4 double LITs on a patio and drunk texting away potential suitors, she managed to graduate with an impressive GPA and an unimpressive engagement ring -- so unimpressive, in fact, some might say it's not there at all. Veronica has since been fulfilling her duties as "America's big," a title she gave to herself with the help of her giant ego. She has recently switched from vodka to wine on weekdays. Email her at veronica@grandex.co

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