Why Becoming A Grand Big Actually Sucks


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It all started during your first semester of being in the sorority. Everyone loved you. You were young, you were perf, and the best part was you were new. You were given a big and she couldn’t get enough of you. Every time you heard her call you her “little” in public, your stomach got butterflies. She introduced you to all of the fraternity men as your sorority’s “hottest new initiate.” She taught you which fraternities to socialize with, she revealed her shack shirt collection to you, she bestowed on you the finest big brothers, and she helped you meet your true love: tequila. Your family tree was obsessed with you and you knew it. From scrolling you to chug a fifth to holding your hair for you when you threw up, they were all there for you; everything was perfect being the baby because everyone protected you.

And then, the next best thing happened: You got your own little. A living, breathing new member was finally yours. Yours to peer pressure. Yours to show off. Yours to show the ins and outs of sisterhood and the Greek world you lived in. Yours. It was like getting a new puppy. You now had a built-in best friend that would hate all the girls you hated and make you feel less guilty when you decided to day drink on Sunday instead of study for your Calculus exam. Someone to convince that throwing up at the pre game is the only way to pre game and that the four you went home with was actually a ten. From scrolling her to chug a fifth to holding her hair for her when she threw up, you were there for her; everything was perfect being the big sister because she looked up to you.

And then, the day you were dreading: Your little becomes a big. Your little skittle. Your baby sister. Your person is now getting their own person. And it sucks. Sure, you’re happy for her and you’re excited to extend the family. But you’re also scared and sad because now your little isn’t just yours; you have to share (from frat guys to mimosas) and everyone knows you hate sharing. You watch as your little runs off to socials with her new little, showing her every frat guy you had once shown to your little, giving her little the same introduction that you had given her. Your little is now spending all night crafting, celebrating Wine Wednesday, and throwing up at pre games with someone else. She even drinks out of the same Franzia wine bag as her new little and, gosh dammit, you almost feel cheated on. You feel old and mature and you do not want those kind of responsibilities at 21 years old. From chugging a fifth to holding your own hair when you throw up, you are doing it by yourself; everything wasn’t perfect any more because no one needed you.

Or so you thought.

Just when you’re about to actually study for your Calculus exam (yes you had to retake it because you had spent too much time day drinking instead of studying), your little shows up at your door. She’s devastated because her little went home with that guy from Sigma Chi she had made out with last formal. Her little doesn’t know every one night stand you had to pick her up from. Her little doesn’t know that she went through a really rough time last semester. Her little doesn’t know the heartbreaks, the laughs, the inside jokes, and the heartfelt conversations that you two had shared at three in the morning. But you do. And your little needs you. She needs the one who held her hair and introduced her to tequila and knows why she refuses to speak with the one boy from Beta. And better yet, your grand little needs you. She needs your guidance and wisdom. She needs your advice when her and your little get in a fight. She needs your old fake ID that has been sitting cold and untouched since your 21st birthday. Everything was perfect because your little still needed you, and she always will. You will always be her big, just like you’ll always be someone’s little, but now someone else needs her.

It’s okay to share; that’s what sisters do.

Spending most of her time rationalizing why it is okay to finish a whole pint of Ben & Jerry's by herself, "who what wear" also enjoys fake baking until she's Dorito orange and sub-tweeting Taylor Swift lyrics. Aside from marrying Nick Jonas (please note that this marriage was self-proclaimed), "who what wear" is also known for her infamous table-dancing moves, stolen fraternity t-shirt collection, and being everyone's favorite new member. You can find her dirty-bigging and fraternity hopping on the weekends.

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