Winged Liner Is Out, Dick Liner Is In

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Nice Move

winged-liner

Honestly, people, why wait to fall asleep with your shoes on when you can just draw dicks on your own face, am I right?

Asia Brautigam, 19, as she was poking fun at our obsession with beauty bloggers, experimented with some eyeliner, and well? It’s dick liner. Cat eyes are out. Dick eyes are in.

And a bunch of people began following her lead.

Asia got ahead of the curve and told Buzzfeed she wasn’t trying to shade makeup artists just in case people started saying she was “makeup shaming.” She assured “I think they’re all creative and amazingly talented!” she said, and added, “My dick-liner will never compare!” There ya have it, folks.

Veronica (@VeronicaRuckh) is the Director of Total Sorority Move for Grandex, Inc. After having spent her undergraduate years drinking $4 double LITs on a patio and drunk texting away potential suitors, she managed to graduate with an impressive GPA and an unimpressive engagement ring -- so unimpressive, in fact, some might say it's not there at all. Veronica has since been fulfilling her duties as "America's big," a title she gave to herself with the help of her giant ego. She has recently switched from vodka to wine on weekdays. Email her at veronica@grandex.co

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