It’s the expression heard every Friday morning after $2 doubles at your favorite college bar, the day after formal, or any other occasion where copious amounts of booze is consumed– “My life is a shit show.”
Sure, it’s mostly said as a joke, in a “WTF actually happened last night” kind of way, but there’s some truth in saying you think your life is a shit show. You think you messed up. You have regrets. You wish you didn’t drink so much, you wish you never made out with that guy at the bar, you wish you didn’t have class so you could sleep through this hangover.
You think that makes your life a shit show, but I want to tell you that those things are completely normal. It’s not bad, it’s not shameful, and it’s not even that big of a mistake.
It took me a long time to realize that, because I have the worst morning after anxiety following a night out. I’ll wake up in a panic and frantically look to my phone for answers. Who did I text? What did I Snapchat? Who was I with? Did I do (or say) something stupid? I’ll overanalyze everything and convince myself my friends are mad at me or my ex is going around telling everyone how desperate it was for me to text him. It totally ruins the fun of going out worrying like that. It wasn’t until very late in my college career that adopting a “fuck it, shit happens” attitude is a much better way to live.
That type of overreaction and stress is completely unnecessary. You think things are worse than they really are. You think your tumble down the stairs in heels will be all your crush will remember about you last night. You think that your grades will never recover after sleeping in and missing a quiz. But that’s not a shit show. That’s just college.
You know when your life is a shit show? When you fail out of college entirely, not just a class. When you have to go to rehab, not you and your friends getting drunk three nights in a row. When you get arrested for a DUI, not a citation for minor in possession. When you lose your friends, your boyfriend or your family because of your behavior. These situations aren’t funny, and they aren’t something to be taken lightly.
But my point is that your craziest stories probably pale in comparison to these situations, and that’s a good thing. I want you to give yourself a break and stop being so hard on yourself for going out and getting drunk and making a silly mistake like drunk texting an ex or drinking so much you puke. You’re allowed to have fun, and that’s all this is, having fun and growing up and learning a lot about friendships, relationships and yourself.
If you don’t want to do these things, that’s fine, everyone is in charge of their own lives, but if you want to, just do it. Don’t feel guilty. And if you make a mistake, so what. You’re still learning. You don’t have to be perfect yet. But your life is most definitely not a shit show because you let yourself have fun a few nights a week.
Might I just add, those shit show nights are always the best. They’re responsible for the belly laughs you and your friends get while recapping the events later on. Those stories will be told for decades at weddings, alumni events, or whenever you catch up with your college friends after you graduate. You can’t leave college without having at least one really, really good story to tell.
So have fun, but don’t call your life a shit show, because it’s far from that. You’re a normal college student making normal college mistakes.
Stop feeling guilty and start living. .