20 Benefits Of Being A Hot Mess

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Hot Mess

I get it. As members of sororities, we’re expected to have it all together, and we usually do. We’re the girls that are at the top of our classes, hold officer positions, run philanthropy events, take 19 hours, and spend any free daylight hours we have at our jobs, internships, or volunteer activities. Every now and then, though, all of those obligations really add up, and we’re way too young to deal with stress wrinkles. Sometimes, when this stress builds up, there’s only one thing to do — book yourself a one-way ticket on the Hot Mess Express. I’m here to tell you that not only is this perfectly normal behavior, but it actually comes with a surprising amount of perks. Let me present to you the benefits of being a hot mess.

1. No one ever expects you to DD.

2. No one judges when you up in a shack shirt and last night’s heels.

3. The Starbucks barista knows your 1 PM Sunday hangover coffee order by heart.

4. You’ve never paid for a drink. Ever.

5. You own at least one shack shirt from every fraternity on campus.

6. No one expects you to help at philanthropy or recruitment events.

7. It’s expected that you’ll be at LEAST an hour late everywhere, so take your time getting ready.

8. People send you their lecture notes for your classes before noon because it’s assumed you won’t make it.

9. Pledges from at least three fraternities have your number on speed-dial at this point, so you’ll never be without a ride.

10. Standards doesn’t even deal with trying to send you e-mails anymore.

11. Slutty Instagram photos are just par for the course.

12. You actually get away with more because standards has such low expectations of you.

13. Your professor’s “three tardies equals one absence” policy no longer applies.

14. You’re never slammed with the workload in a group presentation. You’re essentially just expected to show up, which is good enough for you.

15. You don’t have to play the fake “I don’t have my wallet” card to avoid paying. You literally haven’t seen your wallet in days.

16. You don’t have to feel bad about all those phone contacts like “Tom – bar,” “Matt big arms,” or “Jake/John/Jeremy???” anymore because there’s a 99.9% chance they all have you saved as “Kate big tits.” Score = evened.

17. Everyone knows who you are without expecting you to know who they are in return. It’s awesome.

18. No one will get mad at you for showing up to a recruitment mixer with a little bit of Jack in your Diet Coke. They’re honestly just glad you showed up.

19. Even if you decide not to show up for that recruitment mixer, that’s fine too. Your risk management chair will thank you for staying in bed.

20. You’ve stopped keeping track of your number, and let’s be honest, what you don’t know can’t hurt you…right?

***

RecruitmentChairTSM (@TheRecruitChair) is a contributing writer for Total Sorority Move. This current grad student and ex-sorority girl survives solely on Diet Coke and the tears of the pledges she personally victimized. She's a Monica, a Marnie, a Miranda, and a Regina. Her favorite hobbies include drinking $14 bottles of wine and binge-watching season 2 of Grey's Anatomy until she cries. You can send her annoying e-mails at RecruitChairTSM@gmail.com

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