31 Thoughts You Have Before Getting Your First Tattoo


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If you’re anything like me, you’ve probably been debating getting a tattoo since high school, but nothing’s ever struck you as “the one.” Until it does and then you can’t get your mind off it. You keep staring at that spot on your leg or arm or back and imagine just how cute it would look. But the commitment issues are real and you go back and forth on the idea every single day.

  1. Okay, this is it. I’m finally doing it.
  2. I’ve done the research. I’ve asked all my friends about theirs. It’s time.
  3. I’ve searched Pinterest for an embarrassing number of hours for the perfect tattoo.
  4. I just hope it’s not too basic.
  5. Like, obviously it’s a little basic. You would expect that from me.
  6. But it’s not like a flower or dreamcatcher or anything like that.
  7. Or one ~inspiring~ word in cursive.
  8. No, mine’s better. Everyone will be envious.
  9. And I’m not dedicating it to anyone. This is for me.
  10. Hopefully my future employer doesn’t care, because they still care about these kind of things for some reason.
  11. As long as I never have to wear a swimsuit to work, I’ll be able to cover it up.
  12. But what if that’s a thing? No, that can’t be a thing. Right?!
  13. I’m just a little nervous about the pain. One of my friends said it was like a light scratch, but another one said it was worse than that.
  14. I think I have a high pain tolerance. I’ve gotten injured before and never really had a problem.
  15. Now that I think about it, most of those injuries were drunken ones.
  16. Maybe I’ll drink a little beforehand, take the edge off.
  17. No, wait, that’s exactly what you’re not supposed to do.
  18. Should I ask my mom first?
  19. Like, I know I’m an adult, but what if she disowns me?
  20. Or worse, what if she cuts me off?
  21. She wouldn’t do that. Who am I kidding? She’ll probably just give me “the look” and I’ll tell her I made Dean’s List again and all will be well.
  22. Just as long as my grandma never finds out.
  23. Okay, I’m making my appointment. I’m not changing my mind.
  24. This a decision that will affect my body for as long as I live, but I’m doing it. No regrets.
  25. Actually, wait. I’m not sure I totally love the design just yet.
  26. Maybe I’ll ask some of my friends what they think first.
  27. As long as I get it done before it’s time to go back to school.
  28. Wait, but then recruitment starts and I’ll be too busy to take care of it.
  29. I’ll just get it done before spring break then.
  30. But you’re not supposed to get salt water on it.
  31. Whatever, I’ll figure it out.
  32. Maybe I’ll just get a haircut for now. Way less commitment.
Blackout_B (@b_m4rie) enjoys drinking beer by the gallon and making memories she'll never actually remember. When she isn't embarrassing herself by making out with randos on the dance floor, you can find her pretending it's normal to drink a glass of wine with breakfast every day. It's fun to sit down with her on Sunday mornings and hear how fucked up her weekend was. Send inquires about her sanity to: brionna346@gmail.com

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