51 Things You Wish You Could Ask Him Without Sounding Crazy

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Nice Move

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  1. Why did you like that girl’s Instagram picture?
  2. Do you think she’s prettier than I am?
  3. No, but really?
  4. Is the stuff you watch in porn actually something you’d want?
  5. If you did watch porn–but you don’t, right?
  6. You’ve never gotten a lap dance, have you?
  7. Do you remember what I was wearing the first time we made out?
  8. When you go out with the guys, can you just, like, not make eye contact with any females?
  9. Actually, can you just not leave the house, ever?
  10. You don’t still think about your ex, do you?
  11. What do you think you’ll do at your bachelor party?
  12. Please delete every girl you’ve ever hooked up with, kissed, or shared a conversation with on social media.
  13. Actually, can you just delete all of the girls? It’ll be easier.
  14. How come I’m not in your profile picture?
  15. Did you ever hook up with that girl you just said hi to?
  16. Why the fuck did that girl just hug you? Do you like her or something?
  17. You didn’t text me back right away because…?
  18. If we had a threesome, you wouldn’t leave me for the other girl, would you?
  19. Can you tell me I look pretty and that you’ll stay with me forever every hour on the hour?
  20. Are your boners always for me or…?
  21. Would you love me more if I had bigger boobs?
  22. Your ex had bigger boobs. Is that, like, something you miss?
  23. No, you like my personality right? She had a shitty personality, didn’t she?
  24. What did that tweet mean? #Seriously
  25. You realize I can see the Instagram pictures you like, right?
  26. When are you thinking about getting married?
  27. More specifically, when are you thinking about marrying me?
  28. If I got pregnant, you’d help me raise the baby, right?
  29. What would we name it?
  30. Do you think my hair looks sexy pushed back?
  31. Between Kate Upton and me, you’d pick me–right?
  32. Can we just live together and cuddle but, like, only have sex when I want it, and also have you not cheat on me?
  33. Are you mad at me?
  34. Like, at all?
  35. Do you still talk to girls you hooked up with?
  36. Yeah, you need to stop that. Like, now.
  37. I DON’T CARE IF THEY’RE YOUR FRIENDS.
  38. I SHOULD BE YOUR ONLY FRIEND.
  39. EVER.
  40. Why didn’t you get me a present for our three month anniversary?
  41. Do you not love me?
  42. If we were in “The Notebook,” would you be Noah or Lon? GO!
  43. Why do you have a passcode on your phone?
  44. No, I get it but, like, are you hiding something?
  45. You got a text. Who’s it from?
  46. Does you mom like me?
  47. Did you mom like your ex more? Like, at all?
  48. Who’s in your group project? Are there any girls in it? Are they pretty?
  49. Why are you still friends with your ex on Facebook?
  50. Who’s fucking hair is this?
  51. You don’t think I’m crazy, do you?
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Nice Move

yeahokaywhat

Aspiring to be the next Oprah/Tina Fey, @yeah_okay_what spends her free time doing nothing to reach that goal. While judging people based on how they use "they're" vs. "there" on social media, she likes eating buffalo chicken dip, watching other people's Netflix and wearing sweatpants way more than is socially acceptable. Hate mail and cat videos can be sent to: yeah_okay_what@yahoo.com

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    • 8
      IrmarieDM

      Because maybe they’re not insecure with him but more insecure with themselves. I’m very insecure though I think I compose myself well; I’ve been cheated on 8 times and with a clear mind I know that it’s my fault for picking douchebags. Like half of them were just downright obvious, too, and that use to make me feel really stupid. For a long time my only thoughts were “What’s wrong with me” and it gets harder and harder to trust with that train of thought. I’ve had a lot of these thoughts before but I like to encourage women to think better than this. There are men in this world that wouldn’t want to live another day without seeing you smile; find those men! It’s hard as hell, don’t get me wrong but at least there would be a peaceful state of mind in their presence.

      ^ ThisBless your heartReply • 3 months ago
      • 8
        moralsavvy

        Instead of making your better thought “I can find a better man that could make me feel at peace.” why don’t you instead seek to find a way to be happy, serene, and secure just by yourself? That way, no matter what kind of men you may date, no matter what hardship you might face, you will always be able to be okay, always be able to find your happiness. Security does not come from others, it comes from within. Find that for yourself and you’ll never need depend upon another person to make you complete.

        ^ ThisBless your heartReply • 3 months ago
        • -1
          IrmarieDM

          I’ve gained back a lot if confidence in the past year but truthfully I’m a dependent person. I have dreamed about happily coming home to my husband. That person that will relish in my victories and lend me a shoulder when I need a cry. I mean, if that person wasn’t my husband it would be a friend or a family member (…just without the sex). Idk, I have always wanted love to exist and I know I’m a special kind of partner. “I desire to share my life with with a special man friend” -awkward braces/acne cursed teenage diary circa 2009

          ^ ThisBless your heartReply • 3 months ago
  1. -2
    Sigasigasigmachick

    This is the dumbest list I have ever seen on this site. It’s sad that I have seen it so often though. This is what our generation of young women have become, nothing but insecure girls who think that getting cheated on is normal and that being treated like crap by a guy is the best they can get. STOP SETTLING FOR LESS FOR YOURSELF GIRLS! Be a strong woman and maybe you will find that more REAL MEN will fall for you, not those lying, cheating scum-tards that you have been messing around with for far too long.

    ^ ThisBless your heartReply • 3 months ago
    • 50
      passthemalibu

      When she made this list she wasn’t being serious, although some girls do this. She In fact showed how crazy girls sound when asking these and many more questions.

      ^ ThisBless your heartReply • 3 months ago
      • 31
        EyeLean5280

        Disagree. Yes, this is satire, but I don’t think it’s look-how-silly-some-women-act satire. It’s c’mon-girls-admit-it-this-is-how-we-really-feel satire. And as such is pretty nauseating.

        ^ ThisBless your heartReply • 3 months ago
    • 14
      Tuco1855

      Why do you assume that every insecure girl became insecure directly because of a scumbag guy either in the present or past? Some girls are just insecure. Doesn’t mean they have skeletons in their closet. Is it wrong for a guy to like another girl’s instagram photo? Do you have to compare yourself to his ex all of the time, and question the differences between you and her? No. Of course it happens though, girls are emotional, but don’t sit her and blame every crazy girl on the actions of scumbag guys. Plenty of good guys have relentlessly nosy and insecure girlfriends.

      ^ ThisBless your heartReply • 3 months ago
  2. -4
    emjojo

    What the f? This is a joke, right? This girl sounds certifiably insane. If by some miracle she were to get a boyfriend, it would not last more than an hour. Yikes.

    ^ ThisBless your heartReply • 3 months ago
  3. -4
    jenneifer12

    I want to share my testimony on how i was able to get back my husband last few months and with the help of Dr Ekaka because my man left me for over 3years and went on with another lady and i was unable to move on with my life because of the love i have for him last month i saw a testimony on the internet on how Dr Ekaka help someone with love spell so i never believe it but just have to try my faith which i did and i contacted him on his email: ekakaspelltemple@yahoo.com and he told me what i need to do and after 2days i received a call from my husband asking me to come back to him it was all like a dream to me i am so happy now as we are back together again thanks to Dr Ekaka and i will advice anyone in need of help to contact him.

    ^ ThisBless your heartReply • 2 months ago
  4. -10
    EyeLean5280

    By the way girls, I’ve been around the block more times than you’ve had birthdays and the real answer to 32, despite whatever he says is NO. In the real world, if you withhold sex, he will step out on you. Period.

    ^ ThisBless your heartReply • 3 months ago
    • -11
      brkinnyc

      So then, you’d be ok if the tables were turned on that? My boyfriend is north of 45 (I’m not in college anymore, but still in my 20s) and cannot meet my needs anymore. So it’s totally cool if I cheat on him with someone who might actually have a chance of keeping up with me, right?

      ^ ThisBless your heartReply • 3 months ago
      • -4
        brkinnyc

        ^^ Just realized with a name like “EyeLean” you are probably a woman. Sorry, the sexual frustration is driving me insane. In any case, the point still stands.

        ^ ThisBless your heartReply • 3 months ago

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