8 Signs That You Need To Dump Your Boyfriend


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Every relationship has an ending date. It might be the morning after the drunken hook up. It might be two years after an on-again-off-again nightmare. Or, if you’re one of the lucky ones, it might be death (ah, isn’t love morbid?). Sure, we’d love to think that the person we’re currently tagging on social media is the one, but chances are he might not be. Worse yet, you might totally know that he isn’t the one, but you’re too scared to end it.

So, to avoid months of wondering if it’s time to dump him, I’ve decided to shed a little light on how to know when your love has run its course. Because the only thing worse than ending a relationship, is not ending it and spending a miserable life together.

1. You Don’t Want To Have Sex With Him

This is probably one of the biggest signs that your relationship is o-v-e-r. I’m not saying that the “I need to rip your clothes off right effing now” passion has fizzled. That’s normal. But if the idea of taking his D sounds super unappealing, that’s not a good sign. Sure, you can try to work on it and spice things up. But there’s a difference to losing the spark, and being grossed out by the thought of intercourse with him. The first is relatively normal. The second is not.

2. But You Think About Having Sex With Other People

While the thought of having sex with the bf makes you want to gag, the thought of having sex with other people makes you feel good. Like really good. Like, your vagina wants some of that, good. Whether it’s his best friend, that guy from your chem (okay, communications) class, or some girl you’re crushing (no judgements if you feel like trying out the other team), if you’re getting hot and bothered thinking about other people, that’s a big warning sign. Not that you would ever cheat, but well, maybe you would. So get out of your bad relationship before you become the bad guy.

3. You Don’t Look At Him The Way You Look At Your Food Coming At You In A Restaurant

This is a big one. You know when you’re hangry, and you’re just waiting for your delicious, carb-filled, cheesy meal at a restaurant. You’re so excited and anxious and you’re just dying to have it. And then, you notice it. From across the room it comes at you. Your heart starts pounding, and you get nervous. You want to run and grab it because you’re so freaking pumped about your future together. You try to hide your splitting grin, but you can’t because you love it so. freaking. much. You’re so enthused to see it.

That’s how you should feel about your boyfriend. If not, get out.

4. He Sort Of Grosses You Out

And not in an “OMG you left the seat up/you’re all sweaty/you never clean your dishes” way. In a “I don’t want you to touch or talk to me” way. If the things he says, the stuff he does, or who he is as a person makes your skin crawl, it’s a pretty good indication that you should crawl, or sprint, away from that weird situation.

5. And He Actually Annoys You

His jokes aren’t funny. His stories are embarrassing. You don’t like bringing him around your friends, and you hate being around his. If he sincerely annoys you often, and not in a cute way, then you’re wasting your time. He’s not going to change. And you’re not going to get over how lame it is when he talks about “how cool he was in high school.” Cut you losses and cut him out of your life.

6. You Don’t Like Texting Him Back

You don’t need to text each other all of the time. Actually, you shouldn’t. You’re adults and need to stop that needy shit. But if you never want to talk to him, and your conversations are not only stale, but they usually lead to fighting, then it might mean you aren’t technologically compatible. I mean life compatible. I mean, you guys suck as a couple and should stop ASAP.

7. You Overcompensate With Social Media

What’s the first thing people do when their relationship is going south? They try to make up for it on Instagram. With tons of pictures bragging about how in love they are, it’s bound to make it true, right? LOL no. No matter how many times you try to convince everyone that he’s your “Man Crush Everyday” it’s only a short amount of time until you’re hashtagging #SingleBitches.

8. You Think About Breaking Up

This is the big one. The final straw. The sign that you need to stop reading and end it now. If you’re thinking about ending it. If you’ve have the conversation over and over in your head. If you’re just waiting until this event passes, or until that event is over then your relationship is so dead. If you fantasize about cutting him out of your life, then there is no fixing it. There is no working on it. There is no getting better. Find someone who makes you happy and let him do the same. There are plenty more guys out there who will ignore you for football and insist that you’re not fat. Trust me.

(yeahokaywhat) Aspiring to be the next Tina Fey, Rachel spends her free time doing nothing to reach that goal. While judging people based on how they use "they're" vs. "there" on social media, she likes eating buffalo chicken dip, watching other people's Netflix, and wearing sweatpants way more than is socially acceptable. Hate mail and puppy videos can be sent to: rachel@grandex.co

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