1. The Sister
He is your go to, the peanut butter to your jelly, the backup date to all your parties. You tell him every detail in your life from who you are crushing on to what you are craving on your period. He is always there to snuggle when you are sad and make you feel better. And you’ve literally never even considered hooking up with him. He brings all the perks of a boyfriend, without the blow jobs, and for that, you love him more than wine and pizza.
2. The Brainiac
He single-handedly saves the fraternity from academic probation with his GPA every semester. One day, he will be president. Of the fraternity. And maybe the country, you don’t know his life. When he invites you to the library for a “study” date, you actually study, which sucks now, but he’s going to make some gold-digger very happy someday.
3. The Meathead
You can barely stand next to him without inhaling sweat and protein powder. If he isn’t at the bar, or the house, then he is at the gym. He is constantly talking about how much he can lift and he carries around a gallon of water to let people know he goes HARD when he works out. We get it. You can bench press a sorority girl even when you’re drunk. Now maybe buy a bigger t-shirt.
4. The Die-hard Bro
He is one hundred and fifty percent dedicated to the chapter. He lives, eats and breathes his fraternity and bleeds its colors. He is the pledge who wears his letters with his pastel shorts every day, but by senior year he is the guy on the roof of his house with the beer belly screaming at PNMs to rush his frat.
5. The Jerk
It seems like these guys are the most prominent, but really, they’re just the ones we bitch about the most, which makes their presence seem bigger. Every girl has been some level of involved with a frat guy who’s just a straight up asshole. He’s only after one thing — well, two things. First booze, and then your body. Isn’t that always the way?
6. The Dad
He is always there to help a brother (or a sister) home. You always feel like you can call him and rely on him. He already has the warm beer in is hand all he needs is a minivan and a baseball hat to be an actual dad. Well, and kids, but whatever.
7. The Sweetheart
No matter how many guys in a chapter make you curse the day you were born with a vagina, but then there’s a guy who redeems his whole fraternity. He is the sweetest guy you know. He always texts you to make sure you mad it home and never fails to give you a hug when he sees you on campus. He is the reason you still have faith in frat boys.
8. The Partier
He has taken the “It’s not the grades you make its the hands you shake” mentally a little too far. He averages eight beers throughout the day, then takes the second star to the left and goes straight on til morning. His beer bod is strong, but he’s a good time. Most likely to throw furniture off the balcony, but before he gets to that point, he’s someone you want to have around..