How To Rebound From A Breakup, According To Science


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How To Rebound From A Breakup, According To Science

Breakups suck. You go into an emotional tailspin, lose control of your rational thought process, go on a revenge sex rampage, and consume enough ice cream to keep a small dairy farm in business (#noshame). But according to The Huffington Post, losing your boyfriend/friend-with-benefits/imaginary husband can have actual repercussions on your physical health. Luckily, now that we are aware of these threats, we can take preventative measurements to combat their effects. So grab your organic pressed juice and listen up, ladies, because nothing is more important than your health.

Take a jog.
According to one study, social rejection of any kind can lead not only to a crushed ego, but it can also cause your heart rate to drop rapidly. Luckily, nothing speeds it back up quite like the aforementioned revenge sex. Or you could always just go the old-fashioned route and take a jog. And if you happen to stumble upon your new ex’s car and you happen to have a baseball bat in hand, then what is stopping you from getting a little arm workout as well?

Eat more.
This one is sort of a no-brainer, but studies suggest that emotional stress can crush your appetite. Knowing that you may be at risk for reduced hunger, you should probably play it safe and buy a few extra pints of ice cream. And because we all want a balanced diet, you may want to grab a few six-packs to add some much needed carbs to your diet. As for your daily serving of fruit, go for a healthy fruit salad. Soaked in wine. Sangria. Have sangria.

Get coffee.
When you lose your boyfriend, your concentration can go down. If only some magical drink existed to help boost concentration levels and gives you motivation. Oh, wait.

Facebook stalk his friends.
One experiment found that looking at photos of an ex actually feeds the same part of your brain that reacts to being high. As in, you are literally getting high off of your ex. Simple solution: instead of stalking your ex or actually becoming a drug addict, stalk his hot(ter) friends. It’ll give you the same high, but you won’t feel guilty and you won’t risk becoming a felon. Bonus points if you have revenge sex with them.

Go blonde.
If you think your drain is clogged now, just you wait. Research shows that stress is associated with hair loss, but luckily you can avoid this curse too. Refresh your strands with a new haircut, and add a little dye while you’re at it. And after all, blondes do have more fun and you’ll save so much money by not having to buy a new vacuum.

Next time you go through a breakup, keep these tips in mind. Your ex may be able to take your toothbrush, your cat, and even a little bit of your dignity, but he sure as hell won’t be able to take your health.

[via The Huffington Post]

PSLsandPearls has been shotgunning lattes and looking good since the mid 1990's. In her free time, she cuddles with any animal she can find and incessantly bitches about how busy she is. You can email her at (note the single PSL).

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