I must admit, I don’t know much about The Bachelor. I’ve actually had two members of my chapter compete on the show (random, right?), but even then, I just didn’t care. I’ll watch an episode here and there, but I never got rabidly hooked like a lot of my friends. But I have to say, there is something about Ben Higgins that intrigues me. He’s totally my type, looks wise, and he just seems really sweet. And yes, I know that it’s entirely possible that that’s an act for the camera, but I’ve fallen for it. Therefore, I’ve taken an interest in the competition for his heart, which starts on January 4.
Perusing the contestant bios on the official “Bachelor” page, you don’t really learn to much about the ladies, aside from that they are a little fuzzy on what an occupation is (being a twin isn’t a job, Emily and Haley) and that they have some weird guilty pleasures (chickens, Tiara? (AND YOUR NAME IS TIARA?)). So I decided to delve a little deeper – AKA, stalk these ladies on social media. Taking their Instagram personas into account, here is how I think they rank in terms of the probability of them winning Ben’s love.
Instagram: No Instagram (and a realllllllllllly old Twitter)
Rationale: Do you even go here?
- Lauren aka “LB”
Rationale: She’s got multiple recent pictures with golfer Rickie Fowler (who split with his girlfriend a few months ago) on her account, so I think it’s safe to say her and Ben aren’t meant to be.
- Lauren R.
Rationale: Her account was private until a few day ago, but considering all of the pictures with other guys, rumors are already circulating that Lauren R. gets the boot the first night. Which makes sense, because keeping three Laurens around is way too confusing.
Rationale: So many chickens. They aren’t even cute. Pass.
Instagram: No Instagram (or Twitter, LinkedIn, Facebook, nada).
Rationale: I respect your right to live off the grid, Breanne, but it’s seriously pissing me off.
Instagram: @racheltchen (Private)
Rationale: If she plays has hard to get in real life as she does on social media, she’s screwed. Not literally, of course (wink wink).
Instagram: @shushanna_mk (Private)
Rationale: Nothing on Twitter or Insta, but she uses some site called VK.com (which looks like Russian facebook)? Pics are cute, but can’t gather much else about her.
Instagram: No Instagram.
Rationale: There’s just not enough evidence to make a judgement.
Rationale: One of her instas is a pic of the Hollywood Walk of Fame with her name super-imposed on it and the caption “next stop on my to-do list.” Clearly not here for the right reasons.
Rationale: It’s tough to tell if she actually has a personality since most of her pictures are modeling shots.
Rationale: 90 percent of her pics are her with her two little girls, which is awesome. But I’m not sure if Ben is prepared for a ready-made family.
Rationale: She’s hard to get a read on but considering the amount of inspiration posts, it’s not looking promising.
- Joelle aka “JoJo”
Rationale: So. many. inspirational. quotes.
- Lauren B.
Rationale: Only 60-something posts and way too many quotes. Seriously, stop it ladies.
Rationale: As irritating as her sister, but not as many dog pics. Thumbs down.
Rationale: She annoys me for some reason but there’s lots of puppy pics, so she’s slightly redeemed.
Rationale: From the looks of the pics that she makes public, Jen leads a pretty charmed life already. So the bitchy part of me obvi wants her to get eliminated immediately.
Instagram: No Instagram (but here’s her audition tape).
Rationale: You’ve got a doctorate and you’re on The Bachelor. Aren’t you a contradictory little enigma. But damn, the girl is funny.
- 10. Isabel aka “Izzy”
Rationale: She looks so normal! She’s going to get eaten alive.
- Lauren H.
Rationale: More of a business account than a personal one, so it’s hard to make a judgement, but she does design veryyyyyyyyyy cute jewelry.
Rationale: Only 20-something posts, but something about her ‘gram screams smart to me.
Instagram: @sampass (Private)
Rationale: She’s cute, and she’s an attorney, which means she’ll probably win most of the arguments in the house, right?
Rationale: Anyone that puts on that uniform (with those lashes) gets respect from me. Plus, the girl-on-girl warfare that will ensue will be nothing for her.
Rationale: Her insta is a fine mix of artsy snaps, friends, travel, and food. I’m liking her.
Rationale: The majority of her pictures are her eating: pizza, cupcakes, ice cream, Cheetos. You’re my kind of lady, Jami.
Rationale: Out of over 100 pics, there were only two of her alone. Family, friends, places, food. I like someone who lives life without the camera pointed at themselves.
Rationale: This is more of a hopeful one because her brother IS HOT. I’m hoping she makes it to the hometown dates so I can see more of him. Don’t you judge me.
Rationale: Proud sorority girl? Done.
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