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The Questions You Honestly Wish You Could Ask PNMs

PNM

Ah, don’t you just love this recruitment time of the year? Wearing heels around the clock, smiling until your cheeks go numb, and acting like every. single. thing. the PNMs say is interesting. Oh, recruitment is hot? That’s soooo funny! You laugh politely. You like Starbucks? How crazy! So do I! You feign amazement, as you think about the giant trashcan filled with Starbs cups in the back of the house. You really want to get involved and you did cheer or dance in high school? NO. WAY. You smile and nod while trying to actually figure this girl out.

Sure, she says her dad was Greek, and yeah, she “feels passionately about doing charity work” but what does that mean? What does she mean? How likely is it that she’ll rat on you to standards? Does she handle shots well? Does she take good, copy-able notes?

Luckily for you, I’ve created an honest Potential New Member Application. Much like finding the perfect guy, finding the perfect sisters can be hard. This way, all of the important questions are asked before you give her a bid and before she tells the president that you snuck vodka onto the bus during a date function. Priorities, ladies.

PNM

PNM

Happy recruiting!

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Rachel Varina

(yeahokaywhat) Aspiring to be the next Tina Fey, Rachel spends her free time doing nothing to reach that goal. While judging people based on how they use "they're" vs. "there" on social media, she likes eating buffalo chicken dip, watching other people's Netflix, and wearing sweatpants way more than is socially acceptable. Hate mail and puppy videos can be sent to: rachel@grandex.co

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