What I Wish I Knew About Recruitment

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What I Wish I Knew About Recruitment

Spring recruitment is fabulous, because you get to pass judgment on every house before you join your own. It gives future sorority girls across America the chance to judge without risking epic karmic revenge, because recruitment is for the greater good. Spring rush is entirely beneficial. The only drawback is that “spring,” even in the south, means that it’s still far too cold to function, and you have to drop your coat at the door to show off your sundress. Luckily, you already have a whole crew of friends from your floor, which makes it a less stressful concept, even though as a reality, it’s still pretty rough. Here’s what I wish I knew.

They’re Watching You

I don’t mean to make it sound too much like a horror film, but all eyes are on you for the entirety of your first semester. Despite the stalk-a-thon, feel free to get as sloppy as you want on the reg. If you’re not downing straight vodka shots before hitting the Everclear-infused vat every night, you’re doing college wrong. Unfortunately, if you’re the girl who was caught railing lines off of some legacy’s D in the middle of the biggest fraternity party on campus while rolling in sweatpants, the recruitment board will probably not be feeling you when they slideshow your adorable school picture to the chapter, even if you do have references up the wazoo. You can get as wild as you want, and you should, because there’s no standards chair to stop you, but make sure you won’t be the primary topic on a Greek gossip message board before you even go Greek. If you go rogue by having a very public bathroom break in the middle of a fraternity house and/or your name rhymes with an STD (sorry Lydia Chlamydia), you might have a little bit of trouble getting a bid.

Don’t Get Too Attached

You have the entire first semester to stare at all the sorority girls walking to class and imagine yourself in their shoes shirts, examine just how high their heels are at night, and creep on their Facebook pages to see if they’re as pretty and popular as they seem once you’re finally sober. Obviously, you’re going to get attached, but it’s like cyberstalking a boy. You may have no real interest in him, because you haven’t exchanged words without the help of 5+ shots of liquid courage, but after staring at his Instagram you’re convinced he’s a valuable human who should 100% agree to be your boyfriend.

In fact, second semester recruitment as a whole is the same as liking a new boy. Imagine the top house as the lovable six-pack for a brain Ryan Lochte. You dream of getting it in your life together, and it seems wonderful. In reality, it would be pretty boring since he’s as dumb as a doorknob. Recruitment is the same. Instead of wanting the top house simply because it seems perfect, go for the house you can actually see yourself in for the next four years, because finding a home is more important than the pursuit of a perfect reputation.

It’s easy to get caught up in reputations, because you love name brands. The reality is that while you obviously want to be proud of your house, joining a sorority is so much more than telling people you’re a (redacted) and having them look at you in awe. It’s about finding a place where the girls will actually be your sisters. That place completely exists, but you need to be open to finding it. Even if you might not have the satisfaction of telling people Ryan Lochte is penetrating you (or that you’re in the top house), you’ll know that you have these girls to rely on for the rest of your life, which is what Greek life is really about.

It will be weird

Recruitment is awkward, because it’s like a job interview for life. It’s hard to know the perfect balance of what to talk about. Obviously, you’d like to discuss booze and boys, but both topics are frowned upon (in excess). That doesn’t mean you can’t mention your favorite fraternity party or where you went to happy hour last week, it just means you probably shouldn’t talk about that time you blacked out, vomited everywhere, and got kicked out of the campus bar. Honestly, you’ll feel it out, and sometimes if you’re really bonding you can get weird with the girl you’re talking to, but try to be your best self. That doesn’t mean you need to be a fake version of yourself, it just means it’s like a first date. After all, like dating, you need to convince people you aren’t crazy if you want a bid (or a second date). Luckily, by the time you’re in the sorority (or in a relationship) it’s too late for them to escape.

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