As the weather gets colder, girls everywhere are sighing as they say, “I just wish I had someone to cuddle up with.” Well, now you’re all in luck, because there’s an insane cuddling service that just opened a few days ago called Cuddle Up To Me, where you can literally pay strangers by the minute to cuddle you on a strange bed while someone else watches you on a surveillance camera. It’s totally romantic and not at all creepy.
For just $1 a minute, you can cozy up to the stranger of your dreams and fill your heart with holiday warmth, as well as fear. Don’t worry, though. These cuddlers are professionals who must go through an entire 40-minute training session designed to make you not feel like you’re wrapped up in the arms of an axe murderer. I mean, there’s probably only the slightest chance they are. You’re safe, almost definitely.
We’ve all gone home with strangers from bars before, but meeting up at an office to pay someone to cuddle with you just seems so awkward and creepy and forced and desperate. They’re not even going to buy you a drink first. How do you even handle that situation? Well, 10,000 people said they’d sign up…and they did it in only a week’s time. Ten THOUSAND people volunteered to cozy up to a stranger for some front-on-back quality spoon time. I can’t help but wonder if this service wouldn’t work better as a cuddling dating service, because this company only has four trained cuddlers. You may be on a waiting list for quite a while to be cuddled here, so to be honest, you’d probably have better luck getting some at the bar down the road. You’ll save $1 a minute (which adds up to $60 an hour, or probably six times what you’re making right now) and get a few drinks and a shack shirt out of it as well. Maybe even breakfast if you’re lucky. Don’t be like these 10,000 crazy people. Say no to paid cuddling..
[via Elite Daily]
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