Columns

19 Amazing “Orange Is The New Black” Moments To Get You Pumped For The New Season

19 Amazing

Orange is the New Black returns to Netflix this Friday, and everyone is freaking out. In what is described as the sexiest season yet, Alex winds up back at Litchfield to rekindle the toxic sexual tension with Piper. There’s also a new character named Stella, who will probably try to wife up Piper, because apparently everybody in the vicinity just instantly falls in love with her. To feed our anticipation, Netflix dropped another teaser for Season 3.

To further prepare you for the new season, I’ve compiled 19 iconic moments of the show so far. Remember to clear all weekend plans, because you’re going to want to see the season in its entirety before some asshole tweets spoilers and ruins your life.

  1. When Crazy Eyes had a crush on Piper, and we all loved her even though she scared the living shit out of us.
  2. When the gang learned this very important lesson.
  3. When Larry decided to stop having orgasms, and we were all just like, “What the fuck?”
  4. Red’s entire existence, because she just gets you.
  5. When Pennsatucky got new teeth and we all stopped cringing anytime she talked.
  6. When Taystee got a new weave, made out of Piper’s hair.
  7. When Nicky was the best friend prison wife you could ever have.
  8. When Sophia’s son finally came to visit her and showed the first sign of accepting her as a woman.
  9. When Alex always had the perfect cat eye and we all developed a girl crush.
  10. Anytime Pennsatucky went on a rant.
  11. When Poussey was too smarty to join Vee’s gang, even though she eventually lost all of her friends.
  12. Anytime anyone danced, ever.


  13. John and Daya’s entire relationship.
  14. …and the fact that they’re expecting a baby.
  15. When Caputo had it bad for Fischer, but she friendzoned the shit out of him.
  16. When Gloria hated anyone who wasn’t hispanic, but we loved her anyway.
  17. When Boo and Nicky had a competition to see who could sleep with the most inmates.
  18. Pennsatucky and Healy’s unlikely friendship.
  19. When Rosa escaped and was able to live out her final days as a badass convict on the run.
  20. Email this to a friend

    Lucky Jo

    Lucky Jo is a former and current TSM writer who likes her men how she likes her coffee: way too hot and unforgivably bitter. She graduated from the University of Missouri in 2016, proving that C's do in fact get degrees. She now spends her days working for a social media marketing agency, hiking with her dachshund, and trying to bring back the scrunchie. Hate mail and goat memes can be sent to lucyjmulvihill@gmail.com.

For More Photos and Videos

Latest podcasts

New Stories

Load More