Brace yourself. Finals are just around the corner and things are going to start getting stressful. Your semester has been hectic, what with all the date parties, formals, and um studying? You deserve to blow off some steam and you’re hit with a tough choice: boxed or bottled vino. Here’s an archive of the best reasons to skip the bottle and go straight for the Franz.
1. Buying in bulk is much more convenient when you can stack your wine.
2. The pink shades will always match your Lilly.
3. With just over 30 servings per box, it’s literally a party in a box.
4. Concealing wine in a to-go mug is much more simple with an easy-to-pour spout.
5. At this point, slap the bag should probably just be an Olympic event.
6. A bag of wine is easier to stow in your purse than a bulky bottle.
7. Pairing a wine with a food is easy when Franzia goes with everything.
8. One box will fill just over five Starbucks trentas, perfect for sharing with sisters.
9. On average, boxed wine creates 85% less waste than bottled wine. Your drinking habits are now eco-friendly.
10. Three words: boxed wine bag.
11. A wine bottle opener is far too excruciating for your delicate hands.
12. When your alcohol comes with a handle, you can drink and tone your arms.
13. Always guaranteed to be in your aunt’s refrigerator.
14. Drop a bottle of wine, party foul. Drop a box of wine, pick it up and continue.
15. With new premium boxed wine brands, even your boxed wine can be high-end.
16. When paired with a party tank and a backwards hat, carrying a box of wine on your shoulder like an ’80s boombox is always preferred.
17. A box of wine will always be the best dish to bring to a potluck.
18. Never have to worry about a ‘good year’ when it comes to boxed wine…because they’re fucking incredible.
19. Big stamp of approval from Roger Dorn.
Nice Move294
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Babe Lincoln
Babe Lincoln (@Babe__Lincoln) is a contributing writer for Total Sorority Move and spends the majority of her time knocking back Franzia and introducing herself as "the female Johnny Manziel."
@Babe__Lincoln
@_baberham
