20 Signs You’re A Midwestern Sorority Girl

20 Signs You're A Midwestern Sorority Girl

  1. Sometimes the members of FarmHouse can’t attend your mixer because they are literally working on the farm.
  2. There are more #lakeday selfies on your social media than #beachday selfies.
  3. Your house and the neighboring fraternity have a plan to “share the basement” in the inevitable event of a tornado warning.
  4. You don’t have to buy Mason jars for crafting because your grandma always has a few left from canning season.
  5. PNMs have tried “classy camo.” And failed.
  6. You will inevitably have to be polite to someone from either coast who remarks on how your campus has many more buildings than he or she expected, as if you were supposed to have class in a barn.
  7. The longer the drive into “the city” just means longer you have to drink on the party bus.
  8. You have been to multiple line dancing socials this year.
  9. You have rolling hills or fields with perfect blue skies nearby that make every big-little stack look 10 times more professional than other chapters, who have to fight over the one tree in their yard.
  10. The reunited with pets Snapchats include lots of puppies and kittens, but some also have calves and a piglet or two.
  11. Sometimes members skip chapter to attend the rodeo…
  12. …which is held in your on-campus arena.
  13. You might get to pet the horses if you recruit someone from the equestrian team.
  14. The recruitment team constantly needs a map to figure out which current members are from the small towns nearest the small towns of half of the incoming PNMs.
  15. Sometimes you wish you could wear bikinis to parties like the California girls, but you known the moment the sun goes down, a blistering hot day will turn into the equivalent of mid-American Antarctica.
  16. You never run out of hick jokes for your in-state rival university…
  17. …but you band together to defend your shared state from the huge shadow of the SEC.
  18. Your appreciation for the song “Flyover States” is rivaled only by the national anthem.
  19. You’re very particular about the beef selection of your caterers for formal.
  20. You have sisters who are not only prom queens, pageant winners, and Homecoming contestants, but county fair and 4-H queens, too.
  21. You’re totally over pretending to like drinking moonshine in the summer. People used to make it in their bathtubs. It’s gross. Let’s be real. Drink wine from the bottle like you do the rest of the year.

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DuchessVodkaCran likes bossing people around and eating donuts when no one is looking. Her hobbies include collecting Littles and bad paperback books. She is currently waiting for her boyfriend to graduate so she can graduate too - straight into housewifery.

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