Whether you’re packing up your room for the summer or for eternity, it’s a scientific fact that moving is the absolute worst. It’s stressful, dirty, and it can make you feel nostalgic before you even leave. For me, I hate packing because I hate anything that gives me the feelings disease, including digging up old memories (literally). Whether you’re switching dorms or moving into the sorority house of your dreams, packing is a thoroughly depressing activity.

As sorority girls, we pride ourselves on our love of glitter, ridiculous costumes, and writing each other letters whenever any kind of event occurs, from initiation to graduation. The sentimental part of me wants to keep old composites, senior letters, and shirts I’ll never wear again, but the realistic part of me doesn’t want to spend my final days attempting to rent a pack mule. Here’s why packing deserves its own special circle of hell.

1. I consider myself an independent woman, but the second I see empty boxes, I start fantasizing about a big, strong man–preferably one with a pickup truck.
2. I want to spend my last couple days having fun, and unfortunately, packing drunk is messy.
3. My love of all things sparkly means I leave a trail of glitter everywhere I go, including but not limited to, furniture and bedding.
4. Packing proves that I should never purchase an article of clothing ever again, but it also makes me want to go shopping immediately.
5. I know I won’t wear sorority shirts from freshman year ever again because ugly, but some have too many memories to hand down to the littler ones.
6. While I have no problem cutting ties with not-boyfriends and frenemies, parting with old clothes feels “Romeo and Juliet” kinds of tragic. After all, you never know when an obscure theme party will come along and you’ll finally need those mesh tattoo sleeves again.
7. Craft supplies do not travel easily–the spillage potential is infinite.
8. While I’m not particularly attached to my Target room accessories, I’m also not looking forward to repurchasing them yet again next year.
9. All of the pregames mean you’re left with half-full (always the optimist) bottles of alcohol. Time to become an amateur mixologist.
10. You suddenly realize you should have thrown out some of your underwear a decade ago, because no one wants to see a pair of American Eagle panties, including you.
11. Books are a million dollars, but when you sell them back, you’re lucky to get a couple cents. While I’m happy to have some easy drinking money, I’ve never even seen some of these books before, even if they were recommended (okay, required) by the syllabus.
12. You never know how flaky girls can be until you try to sell your furniture. Suddenly you have thoughts that aren’t very sisterly. Why did she get a bid again?
13. Procrastination is too easy. Before you know it, you’re balls deep in a Facebook creep, surrounded by empty boxes.
14. Moving out in the heat of summer means even your Norts are sweaty.
15. Sure, I do Zumba occasionally, but that does not make me equipped for heavy lifting.
16. Summer storage means you’re inevitably going to forget to bring home something you actually need.
17. You can’t look cute while moving. It’s literally not a possibility.
18. Moving makes you regret every purchase you’ve ever made. Why did you think tiny, shredded jorts were a good idea?
19. Having your parental units around to help is everything, but it also means a screaming match or two might go down.
20. The best way to feel like a total goober is by parading around campus weighed down by boxes, drenched in sweat, and flanked by your parents. It ensures that you’ll run into everyone you’ve ever kissed.
21. I had no idea I had so many pennies.
22. Packing means goodbyes are coming, and I prefer an Irish exit to tears.
23. No matter what your next step is, it’s always hard to leave.

Nice Move321

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Fleur de Lilly

Fleur de Lilly (@margaretabrams) is a contributing writer for Total Sorority Move and Post Grad Problems. When she's not corrupting her big's baby, she can be found decoding texts, gravitating towards raised surfaces, and spending time with her gentleman caller, Jack Daniels. She loves Lilly, Louisiana, and her lineage.

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