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23 Things Only Girls With Big Butts Can Relate To

Screen Shot 2014-06-18 at 10.14.30 AM

You know what they say about fat bottomed girls? We make the rockin’ world go ’round.

  1. Squats are unnecessary.
  2. You have to buy a bigger sized bikini bottom than bikini top.
  3. Even Nike shorts look a little slutty.
  4. You can make even the mommiest of mom shorts look good.
  5. The pants purchasing struggle is real: do I go with too big in the waist, or too small in the butt?
  6. Jean shorts are woefully uncomfortable.
  7. Leggings and yoga pants were made for you.
  8. You consider your backside your best side.
  9. You know he’s looking while you’re walking away.
  10. You try to turn to the side a little in pictures.
  11. Body con dresses WILL ride up and sit on top of your booty after about an hour of being out.
  12. Pencil skirts aren’t appropriate work attire for you.
  13. 2 Chainz wants you for his birthday.
  14. “What a cute dress! I’m buying this for grandma’s birthday dinner.” *turns around and sees view from behind* “Oh. Nope.”
  15. Guys think they have some sort of right to smack your ass. They don’t. Smack them right back.
  16. Your booty has some sort of magnetism. Every guy you’ve dated has been an “ass man.”
  17. Your protruding posterior makes your waist look teeny at the right angle.
  18. “Dat ass tho” is a compliment you’ve gotten used to.
  19. When “A$$” came on in the bar or at a house party, you felt obligated to dance on the nearest elevated surface.
  20. You’ve used the phrase, “I don’t think you’re ready for this jelly” semi-seriously before.
  21. Wearing heels makes you feel like Beyoncé.
  22. Every chair is comfortable.
  23. You’re the first to suggest taking a picture from behind in front of a sunset, a Ferris wheel, an ocean, a monument, or whatever throwing your letters.

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