25 Books You Wish Existed

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It’s officially summer, and cracking open a new book is either at the top or the bottom of your to do list. If it’s a textbook for summer classes, you have my condolences. If it’s some sappy novel due to your tanning (or rather, your nannying job that parks you at the pool everyday) you have my jealousy. Reading is incredibly underrated nowadays, especially in this world where we can’t even focus long enough to read a tweet that’s more than two lines long.

Losing yourself in a book is one of the most simple, beneficial ways to occupy your mind without having to stare at a tiny screen. (That is, unless, you read on a Kindle or something. In which case, I take it back.) When you find the right read, it’s like the planets aligned for the sole purpose of placing whatever work the author has created specifically for you directly in your hands. HA. Totally kidding. Who the fuck reads for fun anymore? I barely have time to multitask watching “Keep Up With The Kardashians” on TV while streaming “Gossip Girl” on Netflix and refreshing my Instagram feed every 17 seconds. Here are some books that would actually be worth investing in from cover to cover.

1. “Believable Excuses To Get You Out Of Going To Chapter”

2. “101 Ways To Ruin Any Possible Chance Of Him Making You His Girlfriend”

3. “The Best Mixers For $11 Vodka”

4. “Being Passive-Aggressive Versus Being An Outspoken Bitch: Pros And Cons”

5. “The Little’s Guide To Becoming A Big”

6. “Surviving Your Mother’s Text Attacks”

7. “9 Vodka Sodas Later: A Brief Love Story”

8. “Crafting Ideas For The Not So Crafty”

9. “Making The Transition From Casual Day Drinking To Nighttime Binge Drinking Successfully”

10. “Boys Aren’t Really That Big Of Douchebags: The Classic Fairytale”

11. “Drunk Texts And Burnt Bridges”

12. “He’s Not The One And She’s Not An Upgrade”

13. “I Swear I Never Do This On The First Night And Other Fun Lies To Tell In Bed”

14. “The Art Of Never Making It To Class Before Noon And Still Passing”

15. “How To Paint Your Nails In A Moving Vehicle”

16. “Oops! You Slept With Your Ex Again, Now What?”

17. “Good Things Seldom Happen After 2 a.m.”

18. “Avoiding Your Standards Chair Under The Same Roof”

19. “I Was Literally So Skinny Freshman Year: A Look Back In Time”

20. “32 Meals To Create With Easy Mac”

21. “Coping With Losing A Best Friend To Her Boyfriend”

22. “All That Glitter Will Probably Stay In Your Carpet Forever”

23. “The Benefits Of Test Files”

24. “Breakup, Makeup, And Fucked Up Sex”

25. “His New Girl Is In Your Rival House: A Murder Mystery”

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Majored in bad language, bad decisions and bad jokes. Usually fucking things up or knocking things over.

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