- Everything is all packed up. Just need to return my keys and check out.
- No dad, I don’t want pictures in front of my door. Wait in the car.
- *Snaps selfie in front of door after dad leaves*.
- I forgot how prison-y my room looked without stuff in it.
- This is weird. I don’t like this.
- *Turns in keys, looks around one last time, starts weeping*.
- Just one last frat lap, for old time’s sake.
- Goobye Theta Chi! Bye Pike! See you soon Delta Chi! I’ll miss you Sig Ep! Kappa Sig, darlings, I loved you most, farewell!
- Ok, just 8 hours between me and my bed at home, I can do this.
- Wait but this is my home!
- I need to go back.
- I can totally stay with Jenny in her apartment this summer.
- I can work at my favorite bar! Fuck an internship!
- I have most of my cute stuff in my car anyway. My parents can just hold onto the stuff in the van for the summer.
- No, I can’t go back. I already cried. I already said goodbye to everyone. Everyone cool is going home for the summer too.
- Oh man, I’m going to cry again.
- *Cries for an hour*.
- Wow, that made the time pass so quickly!
- Ok, feeling upbeat again. Future! Jobs! Cuter clothes! More mature guys! Yes! I might be able to do this whole growing up thing after all.
- Six hours left. Ok.
- Fuck I’m bored.
- Ugh I need to check my messages. But texting and driving kills.
- *Checks messages anyway, nearly hits a cow*.
- Can I hire a copilot or something?
- I’ll just call Danielle and see how she’s doing. Bless hands free calling.
- Holy shit I miss her so much already.
- Seriously though, is it too late to turn around?
- Fuck I need to get gas.
- Jesus I really am in bum-fuck nowhere.
- Oh my God this gas station is too sketchy.
- Fuck, fuck, fuck this dude is going to murder me.
- I can see the headlines already: “Former sorority girl never makes it home: slain by sketchy mustache man”. Sounds legit.
- I need to pee so bad.
- Eh, I’ll hold it. This seems like the kind of place that’ll get busted in a decade for having hidden cameras in the ladie’s rooms.
- If fraternity parties have taught me one thing, it’s how to hold my pee.
- Oh my god, fraternity parties! I miss them. What am I supposed to do without them? Where will I get hunch punch??
- *Sobs the rest of the way home, gets steering wheel wet from tears*.
- Basically, your solo drive home is 100% the time to wallow in self-pity.
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