The slut phase. It means different things for different people. There’s the girl who, after blowing half her graduating class, decides to get dicked down by the starting lineup of her school’s basketball. In one night. She’s definitely going through a slut phase. Or there’s the girl who broke up with her high school sweetheart and considers her “slut phase” the time she made out with six different guys (in a month) and allowed one of them to go down her. I call that Wednesday, but to each their own. The point is that while we all have our different versions of the “slut phase,” we all know exactly what I’m talking about. Hell, some of you are probably in the throes of one right now.
But what about when a slut decides she’s done being a slut? The purpose of a slut phase is that it’s a phase. It has an ending. Sometimes that ending can seem vague or confusing, I mean, when someone has committed so much of themselves to a moment in time, it can be hard to know when they should (but more importantly, want) to move on. As someone currently in the process of ending her own personal slut phase, I give you the four undeniable signs that you’re over being a slut.
1. The need for attention simmers.
Don’t deny it, half the fun in being a slut is the attention. No, I’m not talking about the attention you get from guys that want to fuck you, that’s just the fun and perks of being hot. I’m talking about being the center of attention in the way that Sunday brunch with the girls never truly begins unless you’re there. Everyone has anecdotes from the night before, funny little things that happened, but the slut has stories with so many twists and turns that it has everyone on the edge of their seat, just waiting to hear what crazy thing she did next. The slut lives for the “Oh my god, you didn’t!” and the “You fucked him where?”.
Until she doesn’t anymore. The girl who once felt the need and desire to entertain everyone with stories of her sexual exploits simply doesn’t care anymore. A girl on the tail end of her slut phase is fine when someone else has a wilder story to share the next morning. A situation that once would have spiked her competitive drive to be the most scandalous, the girl who is over being a slut can appreciate the hilarity of the situation. She’s ready to pass on the reigns, and the attention, to the next girl in line.
2. The stories aren’t amusing anymore.
I once described my lifestyle choices to my friend as “if the thought of doing something amuses me for longer than thirty seconds, I’m probably going to do it.” True, this can lead to a lot of problems, but it can also lead to a helluva time. As any slut will tell you, as long as a good story came out of it, the night can be chalked up to a success. But there comes a point when the stories just aren’t funny to the girl anymore. The stories are what make the slut, but there is no point in doing it if there is no fun to it. No matter how outrageous or outlandish, a girl who is ready to hang up her 6-inch “fuck me” pumps just won’t be sufficiently entertained by her personal exploits any longer.
3. The thought of sober sex isn’t terrifying anymore.
Sober and sex are not two words ever paired together in the slut handbook. Drunk sex, high sex, hungover sex, coked-out-of-your-fucking-mind sex, these are all things that make perfect sense to a slut. But sober sex? It’s just so intimate. Some people argue that sex is the most intimate thing that two (or three, four, or more) people can do. Those people would be idiots. Sex, specifically sex in an altered state, is purely physical, not emotional. It’s not even the sober sex that is the intimate part, it’s everything else. There’s talking, getting to know one another, aside from position preferences. It’s more than just the physical act. A slut craves sex. A girl over being a slut desires intimacy.
4. She maybe wants more.
On top of desiring intimacy, a girl who is in the end stages of her slut phase may want more. Dare I say, a committed relationship? Or even if we don’t want to go that far, relationships with dudes that involve more than banging? During the slut phase, guys are good for one thing only, but toward the end of it, she may start to realize that there is more to a dude then just his penis. Companionship, cuddling, getting shit down off high shelves. Even if she doesn’t want to settle down with just one, using a guy for more than sex can have its own rewards..
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ChampagneShowers
Champagne Showers is a contributing writer for TSM. She is your typical Northern Diva. If curse words, sexual content, and drug use offend you, then bless your heart. CS will continue living the life you're too scared to live. email her at: champagne_showers@outlook.com
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