If you are anything like me, you may find yourself constantly updating your résumé. A club here, an activity there, and an internship… nowhere. Getting hired, even if unpaid, is a tough business – and besides, who wants to become someone’s coffee mule for the summer when you can spend your time on more important things? I mean, tanning, working out, reading a few novels, losing fifty pounds, and completely remaking your entire life takes a little time. Luckily, you can intern and still enjoy your summer. So come fall, when it’s time to whip out the ol’ resume, keep these titles in mind. If you manage your time well, you may even be able to double-intern.
Head Product Tester for Victoria’s Secret Swimsuit Line
I mean, yes, Candice Swanepoel does look fabulous in the VS ads. But, has anyone actually put these swimsuits up to the test? Do they survive a hit by a few waves? Will they stay on even after a few too many shots of tequila? These are questions that girls across the nation need answered. So grab your credit card, because you’re about to do some serious research. Remember to include different variables in your experiments: alcohol levels, sun exposure, water exposure, and pool performance should all be tested.
Intern in Communications, Specializing in Analysis of Fuckboys
Ah, yes. The minute you come within a five-mile radius of your hometown, every high school fuckboy you ever met suddenly texts “wyd?” Getting out of these situations is arguably trickier than getting your boss’s Starbucks order correct. But with the correct drafting, proof-reading, and editing, you can come out unscathed — and with an addition to your résumé.
Analyst of Netflix Design and User Experience
While this initially may seem like a self-explanatory internship, don’t be fooled by the name. Not only does this take attention to detail, but it also requires a huge time investment. Duties include: exploring the different genres of Netflix and comparing their varieties, testing the accessibility of the website at different times of the day, and providing mandatory reviews for all Netflix original series.
Coordinator and Head Participant of Sleep Studies
Again, this internship may fool you with the initial ease of it. But remember, you need to take many variables into account in order to determine the most productive environment for sleeping. Mattress firmness, ambient temperature, presence of a partner (or partners), alcohol levels, and type of pajamas should all be tested. This internship also allows for continuous growth, and it will teach you skills that will be applicable to your life in college and beyond.
Intern in Graphic Design, Subspecializing in Facetune
Because you are practically getting a minor in Instagram, it seems like the next logical step would be to get a subspecialty in Facetune. Your color correction (hello, sunburn), shadow elimination (bye, eye bags), and light filtration skills will be fine tuned, preparing you for sorority events throughout the year. And because a picture is worth a thousand words, you’re basically improving your writing skills as well.
They say you can’t have the best of both worlds, but I think the above internships blow that theory right out of the water. And if unpaid internships aren’t your thing, then you can always start charging your friends for your Facetuning abilities..
Nice Move692
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PSLsandPearls
PSLsandPearls has been shotgunning lattes and looking good since the mid 1990's. In her free time, she cuddles with any animal she can find and incessantly bitches about how busy she is. You can email her at PSLandPearlsTSM@gmail.com (note the single PSL).
@PSLsandPearls
