When I was in elementary school, I would make my Barbies kiss each other. When I should have been reading “American Girl” I was reading “Seventeen” and when I should have been reading “Seventeen” I was reading “Cosmo.” We always want to be older. We always want what comes next. While I know this website is for college kids, I realize that a lot of high schoolers are reading this too. So while you youngins are dreaming of the days of being at a university far away from your families, I wanted to stop you. I wanted to advise you. And I wanted to guide you.

High school is great. But looking back, there are a few things I wish I would have known. Here’s some advice to make sure you get the most out of your remaining years at home. Trust me, you’ll be out soon enough.

1. Take pictures of everything, not just your face.
2. If you’re not going to read the book, at least read the Wikipedia page about it.
3. Actually, even if you read the book, still read the Wikipedia page.
4. No one will think you’re a loser if you do well in school.
5. Unless of course you are a loser.
6. But that isn’t determined by grades. That’s determined by more important things. Like clothes, friends, and Instagram game.
7. And even if you ARE a loser? Find good friends and it really, really wont matter.
8. Discover a passion, something you really like to do, and give it all you’ve got.
9. Your parents are there to help you. The sooner you realize this, the easier life will be.
10. That being said, they aren’t always right. Most of the time it’s better to be quiet than to correct them.
11. And if all else fails, just love them. In a few years you’ll wish you would have earlier.
12. People will make fun of you about something.
13. It’s fine. They probably just hate their own lives. Smile. Move on. And get a better salary than them someday.
14. If someone asks you out, and you don’t totally hate them, say yes.
15. Who knows? That might turn out to be pretty great. Now is not the time to be shallow.
16. Your first kiss will probably suck. Don’t worry. It gets better.
17. Actually, your first everything will probably suck. Still don’t worry. It still gets better.
18. Being cool isn’t everything.
19. Seriously. Don’t compromise what makes you great for what makes you just like everyone else.
20. And if you are cool? Be nice to other people.
21. That nerd you copy off of in chem? Yeah, you’re going to be begging her for a job one day.
22. If you get caught making a mistake, own up to it and accept the consequences.
23. If you don’t get caught, shut your mouth and be cool about it.
24. You’re going to have really shitty teachers who don’t do their jobs. You still have to respect them.
25. You’re going to have really great teachers who love their jobs. Appreciate them.
26. You metabolism will never be this fast again. For the love of God, cherish it.
27. Don’t send a Snapchat that you wouldn’t want your grandma to see.
28. And when you DO send a Snapchat that you wouldn’t want your grandma to see, don’t include your face.
29. Failing an assignment won’t mess up your future.
30. Failing a class might. Don’t get to that point.
31. And if you find you need help, ask. At this age, everyone wants to help you.
32. There are more important things in this world than “likes.”
33. BUT make the most of your social media. Post clean stuff. Be clever. Share your talents. People get jobs from having a good social media presence nowadays.
34. People also lose jobs from having a bad social media presence. Think before you post.
35. Hug your mom. Every day.
36. And look up to your dad. He wants to assist you more than you know.
37. Always do the extra credit, even if you don’t think you need it.
38. If it grows in the ground, it’s probably okay. Don’t fuck around with pills.
39. That being said, doing drugs in high school is a sure way to have a miserable life when your parents catch you. Just wait a few years. Drugs will still be there in college.
40. Never cheat on a test, it’s way too risky.
41. Maybe cheat on homework. Maybe. If it’s something painful, like Spanish.
42. If you’re going to get drunk, make sure to do it at someone else’s house.
43. And never, ever drive.
44. That being said, don’t get drunk off of Bacardi Dragon Berry. Just, trust me on that one.
45. If you’re going to lie to your parents, think it through all the way.
46. A well-thought-out plan is the difference between best night ever and grounded forever.
47. Someone is going to break your heart. No matter how much it hurts, it will heal.
48. And if someone who breaks your heart wants to get back together, say “no” and move on. This will save you a lot of wasted time.
49. You don’t have to have sex on homecoming or prom night.
50. But if you do, make sure he wears a condom.
51. You can be dumb about who you’re sleeping with, but not who you’re having a baby with.
52. Your parents know when you’re lying.
53. Seriously. They’ll let you get away with it sometimes just to let you live your life. Be sure to thank them in ten years.
54. That person who turned you down will probably grow up to be a piece of shit. Don’t worry. It won’t matter.
55. Dream big. Work hard. Fantasize about going to an ivy or making the college team. If you don’t do it, someone else will.
56. But enjoy that last few years of being a kid.
57. Seriously. Soon mom wont be making you lunch or tucking you in. Cherish it.
58. Junior year is the most important time to get good grades. Don’t eff it up.
59. Take as many AP, IB and Honors classes as you can. You’ll be thankful you did when you’re hungover in college and don’t have to go to English 101.
60. Once you graduate high school and are finally in college, people really don’t care about your high school grades.
61. Your parents will tell you otherwise. That’s their job.
62. You job is to do the best you can until senior year, and then not royally mess up.
63. Speaking of senior year, don’t skip any classes until then.
64. And once you’re a senior? Try to limit it to once a month.
65. And if by the time you’re a senior you don’t feel ready for college, wait.
66. You’ll save yourself a lot of money and bad grades by working for a year and figuring yourself out.
67. Put. Down. Your. Phone.
68. You don’t care what that dumb bitch you hate-stalk is actually doing. Spend your time on something better.
69. Try new things, no matter how weird they are.
70. Chances are, you’re not going to stay with your high school sweetheart. Love them anyways.
71. And if you end things, try to do it civilly. I know they hurt you. But you’ll look back and feel better someday.
72. And if you don’t feel better? Date someone better than them. Trust me, there are hotter people out there just waiting to love you.
73. Hangout with people who like you. Love people who love you. And do what makes you happy.
74. And if all else fails, college is only a few years, good grades, and fights with parents away. You got this..

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Rachel Varina

(yeahokaywhat) Aspiring to be the next Tina Fey, Rachel spends her free time doing nothing to reach that goal. While judging people based on how they use "they're" vs. "there" on social media, she likes eating buffalo chicken dip, watching other people's Netflix, and wearing sweatpants way more than is socially acceptable.

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