So, you’re having a pretty good day. There’s finally a crispness to the air that means fall is on the way, classes have yet to make you want to die, and your ex gained a good twenty points over the summer — life is pretty good. But even though you’re pretty and popular and oh-so-modest, you suddenly get the feeling. You know, the one where, even though your life is as perfect as it can be, you lowkey want to cry your fucking eyes out.
There’s just something so therapeutic about a good cry. It cleanses your senses and usually makes your lips look plump from all the salt. And while different people have different go-to tactics for crying (some turn on Adele whereas others click on The Notebook) there’s one tactic that works every time: Watching adorable engagement videos.
Maybe it’s because most of us are pretty certain that we’re going to die alone. Maybe it’s because other people’s happiness makes us want to kill everyone. Maybe it’s just the cruel tauntings of our naked ring fingers. Whatever it is, proposal videos always get us in the mood for a gut-retching sob. And so, because I am, in fact, a masochist, I’ve compiled a list of the best proposal videos online because the only thing that makes a perfect day even better is eating a pint of Halo Top and crying over the fact that your sort-of boyfriend hasn’t created a fake movie trailer to ask you to be his wife.
You know, like this guy! Who created an extremely impressive fake movie trailer with a very high production value. Sure, he didn’t give her a speech or anything but hey, the guy got nervous. I bet the cost of renting out the theatre, putting the piece together, and keeping it all a secret from her added up. Impressive work.
Then there’s this guy, who put a fun twist on the movie theatre proposal. Using a fun, trendy song, and incorporating not only friends but also her dad, the whole thing came together in a way that would make you want to plot her death just so you could get the chance to be with him. I mean, uh, it’s cute?
A music video? Sure, that could work. Parts of it are a little dodgy (like the whole music video thing in general), but they’ve known each other since they were 10?! And she’s been hinting that she wanted a ring and he actually *listened?* That right there is a miracle in itself.
Or the one where he randomly says, “hey let’s take a photo booth picture” and for some reason the girl buys it. Still, their adorably awkward “how should we pose” conversation is just about the most real thing in the world, and it’s impossible to not feel painfully alone when he pulls out that ring.
Then, taking the picture concept to the next level and mixing it with Christmas. Because if getting drunk off of Champagne and chocolate on Christmas doesn’t make you cry, seeing your family hiding behind you in “will you marry me” shirts should do the trick.
But let’s not breeze over this on-screen proposal including none other than Ellen. Not only does she get to show off her acting skills (I mean, I thought something was wrong with the audio at first) but she decides to be a part of her staff’s engagement. Now, all that’s missing is the giant check…
Or this Buzzfeed proposal, where the girl thought she was going to be subjected to a painful paint class but ended up with a mf-ing ring on her finger. Sure, the spoon thing was a little weird but hey, you can’t knock the bitch who won a man.
And sure, we all make fun of the flash mob concept, but come on. If your guy hired hundreds of people to dance for you and brought in a full marching band, you’d be a little blown away. It’s okay. I’m crying for her. And me. And for being alone.
And finally, this guy that randomly shows up to a girl’s dance class, dances like fucking Pitbull, and leaves with a fiancé. No, it’s not the most traditional route, but maybe it’s truly the happily ever after we all crave. Because at the end of the day,
we just want someone who will love us forever, plant a big, fat ring on our skinny ass fingers, and give us so much attention that we got viral on the internet. I mean, that’s not too much to ask, right?.
Image via Youtube
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Rachel Varina
(yeahokaywhat) Aspiring to be the next Tina Fey, Rachel spends her free time doing nothing to reach that goal. While judging people based on how they use "they're" vs. "there" on social media, she likes eating buffalo chicken dip, watching other people's Netflix, and wearing sweatpants way more than is socially acceptable.
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